Heady's Place!

First Day of School...2011

2011-08-24T09:22:00.001-06:00

Well the day has finally arrived. I get to spend my days in peace and quiet again. Yes, school has started. Now all the fighting that is done for my viewing and hearing pleasure will be done after school and on weekends. Don't get me wrong, I will miss having them around but I think I can get used to it!

Usually on the first day of school every child wants me to go to their classroom first and gets mad when I finally have to choose one and it wasn't them. This year, however, everyone ran off to their own classrooms and left me and the youngest in the dust. So I bought planners for the older two (these things didn't exist when I was in school) and headed to Gabriel's classroom first. What a sweet boy. I told him I would help him find his desk.....which had his name on it.......which he was literally standing right next to. I told him "look for the desk that has your name on it". He chose a desk a whole row away with a girl's name on it.....oh no! Did he forget his name over the summer break? I doubt it.....he heard his name in it's entirety plenty this summer. Good luck Mrs. W.

As for the other two....I took Madison her planner and she barely paid heed to my presence until....when I turned to leave I thought she was gonna ask me to stay for the day. I knew she wanted a hug and kiss goodbye but that would be totally uncool for a six grader. As for Emily the eighth grader.....she took the planner hugged her little brother and told me "bye mom". I know it was code for go away but I read between the lines and distinctly heard "Goodbye Mother. I Love you. Thanks for being the best mom a girl could ask for. I can't wait to see you after school to tell you about my day and, oh yeah, I promise to clean my room and do the dishes after supper."

My littlest starts his 2nd year of preschool the 29th. I feel I should make the best of this year with him for next year I will surrender him to the public school system and I will find myself childless 8-3 M-F for the time in 13 years. Weird. HAPPY FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL TO KIDS AND PARENTS!

Why I Love Summer Vacation

2011-06-30T13:31:00.001-06:00

My fellow blogger Autumndasey listed her reasons for not liking summer vacation. While I definitely agree with her on many points there is are still a few reasons to love it. My first and foremost favorite would be that after I get my hubby off to work I get to have a nice quiet cup of coffee by myself. During the school year my biggest fight is getting everyone (mostly the oldest) out of bed and ready for school. Actually they get out of bed easy enough but then they enter a time warp. The next thing I know someone is crying about something forgotten as we rush out the door. On summer vacation we don't have that problem. I would have to say that my other favorite thing about summer vacation is watching my kids play....when they are capable of entertaining themselves. My 2 oldest spend their days fighting or hanging on me telling me how bored they are. My 2 youngest love to play outside and they seem to enjoy each other's company (so far) and they don't tell me how bored they are on a regular basis and their ideas to cure boredom don't usually involve me having to consider a loan shark. (my girls are full of expensive ideas) With my boys I just need to keep a watchful eye so they don't destroy the yard, my house, their bikes or each other. Every summer that we get through that won't create a "remember that summer when I broke.....(insert arm, leg, finger etc... here)" or "remember that summer when I burned ______ down" is considered a great summer by me! I took a few pics of my little ones playing in the sprinkler on that one day when it was hot. They had a blast, it was free and no one got hurt....great summer so far!

the Dentist Turned My Son Into An Alien....

2011-06-24T12:06:00.000-06:00

Ever since I started the whole dental quest with my children I have been asking myself why I didn't become a dentist. When the kids ask me what they should be when they grow up I tell them "a dentist". When people ask me what my children are gonna be when they grow up I tell them....."a dentist". Sometimes I dream that one of my girls will marry a dentist. I guess for that matter my boys could marry a dentist....girls can be dentists, right?! In case you are having trouble following, I have a hard time wrapping my brain around how much dental work costs. I guess I shouldn't complain too much...my children qualified for the Montana Healthy Kids...which is why I was able to take them to the dentist before their teeth fell out! After 2 years of constant dental visits, everyone is cavity free and cleared for 6 months! YEAH! Now, instead of paying for the dentist I need to take out a 2nd mortgage to afford all of the gas it took to get to those appointments!
ANYWAYS.....my little man Rollie needs light sedation for his visits and Gabriel is a tough little bird and gets away with just laughing gas. He makes us all laugh and then he falls asleep! These are a few pics of his last visit...he needed the sunglasses to keep the dust out of his eyes and everything combined made my little man look like an alien!

P.S.....yes--he is sound asleep!

I think I see Sun.......Now What?

2011-06-10T08:37:00.001-06:00

I woke up this morning in a panic. My alarm goes off at 5:45am, I hit snooze a few times and then I am up usually no later than 6:15. Well this morning, I couldn't remember how many times I had hit snooze and with the sun shining brightly in my bedroom I thought for sure that I had overslept! I was afraid to look at the clock and even more afraid of telling Albert that I overslept. Well it turns out he was living the same horror because when I got up to turn off my alarm, he jumped out of bed asking what time it was. He thought for sure that it was at least 8 because of the sunlight. Oh well, at least he was up early which made my job easier! We watched the morning weather and turns out we should continue to see the light for the next week or so.....but of course there is chance of showers. (In Montana that is code for ---keep the umbrella handy!)As long as the sun is shining that means my kids will play outside and not be inside fighting on my lap! I am to the point where I will take what I can get! So here's to Mr. Sun..........keep on shining--- and just to be safe I will keep the sunscreen and umbrella at arm's length and brush up flooding & tornado safety procedures....isn't Montana life great?

P.S......I know a soldier in Afghanistan who said the temp has been getting into the 110's. Makes the rain seem not too bad.......

Hell Explained....(By a college chemistry student)

2011-06-09T09:15:00.001-06:00

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls
are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct.......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

My List Of Firsts.....Revisited

2011-06-03T09:31:00.001-06:00

I was reading through some of my old posts and I liked this one. I wanted to rerun it for fun.......the sad part is that nothing in it has changed from when I first posted it. I know that I didn't travel back in time to change anything but I still hit the snooze button this morning, my husband was the first person I talked to this morning and no one has called or texted me yet......I'm not sure but there may be a pattern developing here......

Who was your FIRST pet? The first pet I remember as a kid was a blue tic hound named Freda. She had BIG floppy ears and was always baying at the moon. I remember one time when she tangled with a porcupine and mom had to pull the quills out with a pair of pliers! Wonder what happened to that dog.....

Do you still talk to your FIRST love? no

What was you FIRST job? My first job I got paid for was babysitting but my first real "had to have an interview" job was at the IGA

What was your FIRST car? The first car I had to drive after I got my licence was our HUGE station wagon. Needless to say, I didn't go out driving much.

Who was the FIRST person to text or call you today? No one yet!

Who was your FIRST grade teacher? Miss Loftus

Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane? To California

Who was your FIRST best friend and do you still talk? I would say Aurora....no

Where was your FIRST sleepover? Don't remember

Who was the FIRST person you talked to today? My husband

Whose wedding were you in for the FIRST time? My oldest sister's (does sitting at the guest book count?)

What was the FIRST thing you did this morning? Hit my snooze several times

What was the FIRST concert you ever went to? Nitty Gritty Dirt Band

FIRST set of stitches and how? I think it was when I cut my finger while trying to separate frozen side pork. I ended up getting stitches in my toe the same day I got the stitches in my finger taken out! Good thing I am graceful!

FIRST piercing? My ears when I was 13

FIRST foreign country you've been too? Does North Dakota count?

FIRST movie you remember? STARS WARS (I remember because I held hands with a boy I liked through the whole movie in a room full of kids and tried really hard for no one to see that we were holding hands under a pillow! ;-)

What was your FIRST bike? I got a reconditioned bike that was painted blue and had a new banana seat that looked like denim.....it was AWESOME! My brother taught me how to pop a wheelie on it but after I fell flat on my back it didn't seem quite as fun!

What was your FIRST computer? A Gateway that I ordered over the phone!

Who was your first roommate? I never had a roommate

FIRST kiss? Same boy from the Star Wars movie....different night

Ah......Golf!

2011-06-02T08:07:00.000-06:00

Last night was the first night of women's golf for 2011. (it was supposed to be last week but Mother Nature's Aunt Flo must have been visiting because she was very uncooperative)
Anyways, we all had a blast. I only had one beer but them other girls, they had a lot. I did manage to spill a little in my mouth even though I think I spilled more in my cart. I kept forgetting where I set it and I would drive off and spill it. Autumn always make me drive but I after last night she may actually rethink her position on the subject. She almost learned the hard way that you never tell the driver that she may have lost something off the cart and not expect her to turn around and look.....whether she has the pedal to metal or not she will turn around and look! Oh and there were bushes and bridges and perhaps a few skid marks! To top the evening off I told my golf mates that I was going to win the door prize....I was close. The girl sitting next to me did. (It was Autumn...hahaha) Anyways, here are a few pics of one of the fabulous pieces that was in her prize bag! She felt that the first didn't capture the true her so we took 2 more to get all the angles! She's a beauty and I am proud to call her my sister! Here's to many more fun Wednesday nights!

Dear Time...Please Slow Down!

2011-05-31T09:28:00.001-06:00

Six years and 6 hours ago, I gave birth to my 3rd child, Gabriel William Albert Myrstol. (It really does roll easily off the tongue when he is in trouble!) He was by far my biggest child to exit my body but I love him, nonetheless! (people always compare it to a watermelon coming out of a keyhole but I don't ever recall a watermelon having arms and legs! Life would definitely be dull around here without his unique vocabulary and joker sense of humor! I can't believe that it has already been 6 years but I definitely look forward to the many more ahead! HAPPY BIRTHDAY GABRIEL! WE LOVE YOU!

Call Me Crazy......

2011-05-31T08:07:00.000-06:00

Ever since we moved into the new house with the gigantic back yard the kids have been hounding me for a new pet.....more like a new puppy. We have tried several puppies over the years and it never failed....they never stayed little! I admit that I almost caved and got a dog a couple of months ago....I was even going to (gasp) pay money for one. I am one of those people that end up with a pet because they touched my heart...not to make someone else money. Although I would be willing to pay money to adopt a pet from a shelter....I am not completely made of stone. (although I think my kids would disagree with that)
ANYWAYS, we saw a flyer this past Saturday advertising free kittens. After a beautiful display of begging and a long list of pros with no cons by my oldest daughter, I discussed it with Al (discussed...informed, its all the same right?) and let her make the call. After careful consideration I suggested to (told) Al that we should get 2 instead of 1 because they are siblings and they can keep each other company. I know that if someone came and took my kids at 3 months old I would hope that they went out in pairs! After a trip to the store for a cat box, cat litter and retrieval of said kittens, we now have 2 new members of the family. They are still cute and fun at this point, although I doubt our other cat Blackie would agree......at least she only hisses and doesn't do that banshee growl she does when dogs are around...I think that must mean she likes them....or least that she doesn't intend to eat then for breakfast......

The black and white cutie would be Moonpie and the adorable all black one is Shadow....☺

New Summer Haircuts

2011-05-28T14:49:00.000-06:00

One of the first things I like to do after school lets out for summer is give my little boys their 1st haircut of the summer. As they get older they show more enthusiasm each year but complain about their heads getting cold when it is still snowing in June! (the weather sure has been weird lately!) Gabriel told me that he wanted a mohawk this time. I was fine with that because I usually just shave them bald and figured if it turned out too bad I could just shave away the mistake. Well it didn't turn out too bad but Rollie told me that he didn't want a mohawk and he would be mad if I gave him one. I agreed I wouldn't but once in the chair he decided that he wanted one like big brother! About 15 minutes after the hair cutting was over, Rollie came in crying because, in Gabriel's words....."I was going to fast on my bike and Rollie was going to slow and I ran over him with my bike!" His bike, which is actually Rollie's, is a big wheel trike and he ran over his forehead with the big front wheel! I said it before and I will say it again.....boys are dangerous!!!! I hope you enjoy the mohawk pictures and the last one is to show what happens when your head gets in the way of a big wheel!

Where Is The Time Going?????

2011-05-27T10:15:00.001-06:00

Is it me or does time seem to be moving faster and faster with each passing year? I attended my favorite 2nd middle child's kindergarten graduation today and I could swear that he forcing his way out of my body yesterday! The day after he arrived I am pretty sure that his little brother was putting his finishing touches on ruining my body as he exited the "momma vessel", and yet he will be graduating from preschool at this time next year. Which, by my calculations of the speeding up of time, should be some time next week. Wow...if that's the case then I better get my Christmas shopping done! Oh wait.....i think the world is supposed to end December 21, 2012 so I am good!
Anyways, 3 cheers for my little boy who is growing up! CONGRATULATIONS to Gabriel William Albert Myrstol.....we love you little man!

A Few Creations.....

2011-05-23T10:44:00.001-06:00

I figured since I was on a roll, why not a one more post? 2 nephews and a niece graduated from high school this past weekend and I was elected to make the graduation cake. I figured I would post a pic of it. Then I decided that I would post 2 more more pics of some past creations. The red and white cake was for my niece Sara's wedding this past April and the blue and white one was for my niece Jessica's wedding last October. I hope you enjoy!

I Often Wondered If I Was Related To Someone Famous.....

2011-05-23T10:36:00.003-06:00

As it turns out I have a daughter named Sacagawea. Last Friday my daughter's 5th grade class had their annual wax museum. They get to pick a famous person from history, make a background, write a report and don a costume depicting their chosen figure. A few years before my oldest daughter chose Ronald Reagan. (I think the reason was that she got to wear a cowboy hat which makes her think of horses....I know its a weird link but I think her brain may be part horse!) It is fun to see all of the creative costumes that all of the kids come up with, not to mention the interesting reports. My mom went along this year. When she read Madison's report she asked me if she had any help writing it. Ok! Fine! I will admit it....she asked me to type it up for her and when I did I couldn't help but "revise" a little. I had a hard time with her saying 5 different times that Sacagawea was 16 when she was pregnant just so she could stretch out the report!......There. I confessed....why don't you shine a light in my eyes!) Anyways, she got a gob of extra points for the project and I have to say that I am really proud of her for taking on the task and completing it all (mostly on her own....Good Job Madison!

P.S.....for anyone reading this who believes that I spelled Sacagawea wrong, I believed I did too but I am writing it how Madison did and she swears that she found it spelled that way in her research. If she is willing to swear it, then it is my duty as a mother to believe her.......right?!

3 Months Is A Looonngggg Time...

2011-05-23T10:12:00.003-06:00

I say 3 months and you say "but she has been gone for a year?!". It's true. I have dropped out of the blog scene for roughly a year but I am really wanting to get back into the swing of things, so here goes.
      I say 3 months because that is how much {precious} time I have gotten to spend with my wonderfully pleasant husband of 12 1/2 years. Wow...when I say that many years out loud, 3 months doesn't seem so bad! On January 23rd, 2011, I had a dream that my husband had fallen off a ladder at work and met a very undesirable outcome. (for those of you who are wondering....he died. I know, I know its horrible. I know.)
ANYWAYS, on January 25th, 2011 my sister called me (she works with my husband) to tell me that my husband had fallen off some scaffold at work. "He is breathing and alive but complaining of back pain. Don't panic, he's fine she says." My first thought was "My dream came true! I am a horrible wife!" After securing my kids at Munga and JJ's (that is code for Grandma and Grandpa but that is another story) I pointed my car west towards Bozeman having no idea that this would be the first trip of MANY. Luckily Mother Nature was kind to me and held the snow off. I made it there in record time and yet was completely calm. I found my husband's boss, my sister and my stepson in the waiting room. (They were hard to miss with the piles of dirt and sawdust they left everywhere.) After they brought me up to speed, I went back to see my man.
   Long story short, we spent 2 days in the hospital, took a lot of good drugs, made A LOT of trips to Bozeman to see 2 doctors...one for the pelvis and one for the wrist (which irritated me because they worked in the same office but we never could see them both in one trip--no, we had to go at least 2 or 3 times a week in the beginning!) learned how to get around and up and down stairs with a walker and then modified crutches. He was finally cleared to go back to work just over 3 months after the accident and is back on the job as we speak. (Thank God!....I mean, I love you honey!) I do want to say that he was a pretty good patient and he tells me that I was a pretty good nurse. He just says that because he was thankful that I never made him sleep with a pillow over his face.....
   Through it all we learned that we still love each other after almost 13 years (i am not sure that the kids would say the same....Al is kind of an instigator--no, it's true) that we can get through anything together and thank God for Workman's Comp and AFLAC!

Fishing

2010-04-06T15:23:00.001-06:00

I couldn't resist, this one made me giggle!

First guy: ‘You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come

out fishing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I would paint
every room in the house next weekend.’

Second guy: 'That is nothing, I had to promise my wife that I will
build her a new deck'.

Third guy: 'Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my wife that I will
remodel the kitchen for her.'

They continue to fish when they realized that the fourth guy has
not said a word. So they asked him.
You haven't said anything about what you had to do to be able to
come fishing this weekend. What's the deal?'

Fourth guy: ‘I just set my alarm for 5:30 am. When it went off, I shut off my
alarm, gave my wife a nudge and said, Fishing or Sex?'
She said, "Wear sun-block."

Can You Understand What I Am Saying?

2010-03-26T09:48:00.001-06:00

Oh, the difficulty of language barriers........

After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old barbershop in Jersey to say hello to his friends.
Giovanni said, 'Hey Luigi, how wasa da honeamoona?'
Luigi said, 'Everyting wasa perfecto except for da train ride down.'
'Whata you mean, Luigi?' asked Giovanni.
'Well, we boarda da train at Grana Central Station.
My beautiful Virginia , she pack a biga basket a food. She broughta da vino, some nice cigars for me, and we were lookina forward to da trip and open upa da luncha basket.
The conductore come aby, waga his finger at us anda say, no eat in disa car.
Musta use a dining car.'
So, me and my beautiful Virginia, we go to da dining car, eat a biga lunch and starta ta open da bottle of a nice a vino!
Conductore walka by again, waga his finger and say, 'No drinka in disa car! Musta use a cluba car.'
So, we go to cluba car.
While a drinkina da vino, I starta to lighta my biga cigar. The conductore, he waga his finger again and say, 'No a smokina disa car. Musta go to a smokina car.'
'We go to a smokina car and I smoke a my biga cigar.
Then my beautiful Virginia and I, we go to a sleeper car anda go to bed.
We just about to go boombada boombada and the conductore,
he walka through da hall shouting at a top of his a voice...
'Nofolka Virginia ! Nofolka Virginia !
'Nexta time, I'ma just gonna taka da bus.'

A Funny Story About Aging

2010-03-22T11:24:00.002-06:00

Will this be me when I get older? I feel like I have days like this already!☺ It's a good thing my kids carry a cell phone....you know for the times when I forget to pick them up!☺ Since we have moved the kids complain that they have to ride the bus now....they see it as torture, I see it as "at least you are getting a ride home!" I hope you enjoy this little story....my brother emailed it to me and it made me laugh!

$5.37

That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bell said to me.
I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and something
that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having already handed the kid a five-spot,
I started to head back out to the truck to grab some change when the kid
with the Emo hairdo said the harshest thing anyone has ever said to me.
He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior citizen discount."
I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of change
hitting the counter in front of me. "Only $4.68" he said cheerfully.
I stood there stupefied. I am 48, not even 50 yet? A mere child! Senior
citizen?
I took my burrito and walked out to the truck wondering what was wrong with
Emo. Was he blind? As I sat in the truck, my blood began to boil.
Old? Me?
I'll show him, I thought. I opened the door and headed back inside. I strode
to the counter, and there he was waiting with a smile.
Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in front of
me, like I could be that easily distracted!
What am I now?
A toddler?
"Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?"
I stared with utter disdain at the keys.
I began to rationalize in my mind.
"Leaving keys behind hardly makes a man elderly!
It could happen to anyone!"
I turned and headed back to the truck.
I slipped the key into the ignition, but it wouldn't turn.
What now?
I checked my keys and tried another.
Still nothing.
That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror.
I had no purple beads hanging from my rearview mirror.
Then, a few other objects came into focus. The car seat in the back seat.
Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard. A partially eaten doughnut
on the dashboard.
Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien vehicle.
Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved to finally be
leaving this nightmarish stop in my life. That is when I felt it, deep in
the bowels of my stomach: hunger! My stomach growled and churned, and I
reached to grab my burrito, only it was nowhere to be found.
I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back into the
restaurant one final time.
There Emo stood, draped in youth and black nail polish. All I could think
was, "What is the world coming to?" All I could say was, "Did I leave my
food and drink in here?" At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to
help me back to my vehicle, and then go straight home and apply for Social
Security benefits.
Emo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a young lad
came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention. He was holding up a
drink and a bag. His mother explained, "I think you left this in my truck by
mistake."
I took the food and drink from the little boy and sheepishly apologized.
She offered these kind words: "It's OK. My grandfather does stuff like this
all the time."
All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40. Yes, I was
racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius. And no, I told the officer, I'm
not too old to be driving this fast.
As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the hall.. I
handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket. I promptly sat in
my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blanky.

The good news was I had successfully found my way home.

How You Know When Love Fades....

2010-03-17T17:29:00.003-06:00

I was sitting on the sofa watching TV when I heard my wife’s voice from the kitchen.
"What would you like for dinner, sweetums? Chicken, beef or lamb?"

I said, “I'd love chicken, thank you."

She replied, "Go to hell. You're having hamburger. I was talking to the cat."

Isn't love poetic??☺☺

The Potty

2010-03-11T09:36:00.001-07:00

Even with 4 kids they still surprise me everyday. I am a little surprised that one of my boys never came up with this logic! ☺

A LITTLE THREE YEAR OLD BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET. HIS MOTHER THINKS HE HAS BEEN IN THERE TOO LONG, SO SHE GOES IN TO SEE WHAT'S UP. THE LITTLE BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET READING A BOOK. BUT ABOUT EVERY 10 SECONDS OR SO HE PUTS THE BOOK DOWN, GRIPS ONTO TO THE TOILET SEAT WITH HIS LEFT HAND AND HITS HIMSELF ON TOP OF THE HEAD WITH HIS RIGHT HAND.

HIS MOTHER SAYS: "BILLY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? YOU'VE BEEN IN HERE FOR A WHILE..

BILLY SAYS: "I'M FINE, MOMMY.. I JUST HAVEN'T GONE 'DOODY' YET."

MOTHER SAYS: "OK, YOU CAN STAY HERE A FEW MORE MINUTES. BUT, BILLY, WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF ON THE HEAD?"

BILLY SAYS: "WORKS FOR KETCHUP."

25 Reasons I Owe My Mother For My Education Of Life

2010-02-12T14:11:00.001-07:00

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .  "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2.My mother taught me RELIGION.  "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3.My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .  "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4.My mother taught me LOGIC.  " Because I said so, that's why."

5.My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6.My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7.My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8.My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.  "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9.My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10.My mother taught me about STAMINA.  "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11.My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12.My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.  "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13.My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.  "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14.My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.  "Stop acting like your father!"

15.My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16.My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.  "Just wait until we get home."

17.My mother taught me about RECEIVING .  "You are going to get it when you get home!"

18.My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.  "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19.My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20.My mother taught me HUMOR.  "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21.My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .  "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.  "You're just like your father."

23.My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24.My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.  " One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.

For Lack Of A Better Post

2010-02-03T21:40:00.001-07:00

I believe this is third hand blog but what the heck, it's fun!

Rules: It's harder than it looks. Use the 1st letter of your last name to answer each of the following questions. The more creative the better. Don't copy the persons you read if you have the same letter. Don't make up anything. You can't use your name for the boy/ girl name.

1. Four letter word? Mold

2. A boys name: Marvin

3. A girls name: Meredith

4. An Occupation: Maid

5. A Color: Maroon

6.Something you wear: Mask

7. A Beverage: Mojito

8. A Food: Moo Goo Gai Pan

9. Something found in the bathroom: Mud Mask (is that double the points?☺)

10. A place: Montana (Where else is there?!)

11. A reason to be late: Menstural flow (or lack there of, hence the late thing -- ☺☺)

12. Something you shout: MARCO!

Old Farmer's Advice

2010-01-25T18:32:00.001-07:00

*Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.
*Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.
*Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
*A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
*Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.
*Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.
*Forgive your enemies; it messes up their heads.
*Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
*It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
*You cannot unsay a cruel word.
*Every path has a few puddles.
*When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty..
*The best sermons are lived, not preached.
*Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.
*Don 't judge folks by their relatives.
*Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
*Live a good, honorable life.. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.
*Don 't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.
*Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a Rain dance.
*If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
*Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
*The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.
*Always drink upstream from the herd.
*Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.
*Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.
*If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around..
*Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply.. Speak kindly.
--
*Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.

AND.....

Enjoy The Ride. There Is No Return Ticket.....

2010-01-18T10:05:00.001-07:00

I know that I have posted something similar to this beofre, but I feel it is an appropriate sentiment for the start of a new year. So here's to all of you in 2010!

George Carlin's Views on Aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.
'How old are you?' 'I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.
You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
'How old are you?' 'I'm gonna be 16!' You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!
But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50, and your dreams are gone...
But! wait!! ! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50, and make it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that, it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
You get into your 80's, and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; 'I Was JUST 92.'
Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. 'I'm 100 and a half!'
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3.Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's family name is Alzheimer's.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves Be ALIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

AND, ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways,
totally used up and worn out, shouting '...man, what a ride!'

Last Day of 2009

2009-12-31T17:17:00.001-07:00

This will be my last post. Luckily for my 2 fans it is only the last of 2009. ☺ I will be spending the evening with good friends enjoying good food and drinks that will probably cause me to spend the night with my "white knight"....(let's hope not! ☺) I am thankful for making through 2009 and look forward to new adventures in 2010....but I will never forget the wonderful people that had to leave this world too soon. I wish you all a very happy and prosperous New Year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!☼♥♦♣♠♥☼

Dirt Roads

2009-12-12T07:32:00.001-07:00

I came across this in an email and I LOVED it! I could see a lot of truth to it. I never actually lived at the end of a dirt road but I did grow up in a rural community....the kind where everyone knows everyone! I also grew up listening to Paul Harvey, the author of this story. Thanks for the great story Paul!

DIRT ROADS

What's mainly wrong with society today is that too many Dirt Roads have been paved.
There's not a problem in America today, crime, drugs, education, divorce, delinquency that wouldn't be remedied, if we just had more Dirt Roads, because Dirt Roads give character.
People that live at the end of Dirt Roads learn early on that life is a bumpy ride.
That it can jar you right down to your teeth sometimes, but it's worth it, if at the end is home...a loving spouse, happy kids and a dog.
We wouldn't have near the trouble with our educational system if our kids got their exercise walking a Dirt Road with other kids, from whom they learn how to get along.
There was less crime in our streets before they were paved.
Criminals didn't walk two dusty miles to rob or rape, if they knew they'd be welcomed by 5 barking dogs and a double barrel shotgun.
And there were no drive by shootings.
Our values were better when our roads were worse!
People did not worship their cars more than their kids, and motorists were more courteous, they didn't tailgate by riding the bumper or the guy in front would choke you with dust & bust your windshield with rocks.
Dirt Roads taught patience.
Dirt Roads were environmentally friendly, you didn't hop in your car for a quart of milk you walked to the barn for your milk.
For your mail, you walked to the mail box.
What if it rained and the Dirt Road got washed out? That was the best part, then you stayed home and had some family time, roasted marshmallows and popped popcorn and pony rode on Daddy's shoulders and learned how to make prettier quilts than anybody.
At the end of Dirt Roads, you soon learned that bad words tasted like soap.
Most paved roads lead to trouble, Dirt Roads more likely lead to a fishing creek or a swimming hole.
At the end of a Dirt Road, the only time we even locked our car was in August, because if we didn't some neighbor would fill it with too much zucchini.
At the end of a Dirt Road, there was always extra springtime income, from when city dudes would get stuck, you'd have to hitch up a team and pull them out.
Usually you got a dollar...always you got a new friend...at the end of a Dirt Road!

~by Paul Harvey~

A Great Loss Is Mourned

2009-11-10T07:06:00.001-07:00

A golden heart stopped beating,

Working hands put to rest.

God broke our hearts to prove to us,

He only takes the best.

The Myrstol family lost it's patriarch on November 5, 2009.
David had been sick for a time and we all knew the end was coming, but when it did it was still a shock. It is strange when you know that someone is gone but it still doesn't seem real. You will be going along with your day and then all of a sudden the thought of them being no longer of the physical world SLAPS you across the face. I know that everyone has dealt with death in one way or another, but that doesn't mean it ever gets easy. It makes you stop and think about many things. You think...why didn't I spend more time with them while they were alive? Why didn't I write down every sage piece of advice they ever gave me? Why didn't I give them a hug and a kiss every chance I had? Why? Why? Why?
Well, I for one, believe that even after a person is gone they are not really gone. They may leave their broken earthly vessel that was their body behind, but they are still with us, always. They are the whisper in the trees or the invisible caress upon your cheek. They are the beautiful sunrise or sunset that takes your breath away. They are in the unexpected hug from a child that warms your heart. They are the pennies from heaven that you find in the oddest of places. They want us to know that even though they are gone physically they are always with us spiritually.
I know that death can be a hard thing for many people to deal with. Rather than focus on the fact that a loved one is gone, I choose to revel in the epic story of their life that they wrote while they were earthbound. And believe me, David wrote quite a story. Some may think he was a man of few words, but when he had something to say.....he said it! I enjoyed when he would come over for dinner or stop in for coffee and tell stories about when he was a little boy. Listening to him made me come to realize that I am pretty sure that my children DO get their mischieviousness from the Myrstol side! ;-) Most of his stories usually included the antics of himself and his brother Elmer, but I can't help but wonder if my boys, Gabriel & Rollie couldn't have given them a run for their money! ;-) Something tells me, though, that David was able to use those brown eyes and sly grin to charm his way out of a sticky situation a time or two.
I am sorry that I never got the chance to meet Rosemary, but I know that David loved her very much. I know that David was very proud of the family that he and Rosemary created. He was proud of their ranch and it showed through all of their hardwork. I know that he was proud to call Jerry, Jan, Ben and Birdina his good friends. I know that he worried about his beloved cat Henry like it was his 10th child.....and I also know that David William Albert Myrstol was a great man who was greatly loved and will be missed by many.

We Are AWESOME!

2009-10-29T12:00:00.001-06:00

No matter what our kids and the new Generation think about us, WE ARE AWESOME !!!!
OUR LIFE IS LIVING PROOF !!!!

TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED THE 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.
They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can and didn't get tested for diabetes.
After that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-base paints.
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, locks on doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we wore baseball caps, not helmets on our heads.
As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, no booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes.
And riding in the back of a pick- up truck on a warm day was always a special treat!
We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and no one actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, white bread, real butter and bacon. We drank Kool-Aid made with real white sugar. And we weren't overweight. WHY? Because we were always outside playing ... that's why!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.
We had no cell phones, so no one was able to reach us all day. And we were OKAY.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride them down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We did not have Play stations, color TVs, Nintendo's, or X-boxes. There were no video games, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet and no chat rooms.
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
We would get spankings with wooden spoons, switches, ping pong paddles, or just a bare hand and no one would call child services to report abuse.
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them.
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!
The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever.
The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.
We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.
So if you're one of US, CONGRATULATIONS!
You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids before the lawyers and the government started regulating so much of our lives for 'our own good.'
And while you are at it, share it with your kids so they will know how brave and lucky their parents were.
Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it ?

The following is Jay Leno's quote:
'With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu, swine flu and terrorist attacks, are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?'

Aren't Kids Priceless??

2009-10-24T10:13:00.001-06:00

Would you just look at the expression on the ' other ' little girl's face!
That is absolutely priceless!

THIS IS TOO SWEET FOR WORDS!!!

A six-year-old boy told his father he wanted to marry the little girl across the street. The father, being modern and well-schooled in handling children, hid his smile behind his hand..

'That's a serious step,' he said. 'Have you thought it out completely?'

'Yes,' his young son answered. 'We can spend one week in my room and the next in hers. It's right across the street, so I can run home if I get scared of the dark.'

'How about transportation?' the father asked.

'I have my wagon, and we both have our tricycles,' the little boy answered.

The boy had an answer to every question the father raised.

Finally, in exasperation, his dad asked, 'What about babies? When you're married, you're liable to have babies, you know.'

'We've thought about that, too,' the little boy replied. 'We're not going to have babies. Every time she lays an egg, I'm going to step on it!'

Mental Feng Shui

2009-10-19T09:41:00.001-06:00

ONE. Give people more than they ask for.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
FOUR. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.
FIVE. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.
SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.
EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who do n't have dreams don't have much.
NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.
TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.
THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'
FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
FIFTEEN. Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.
SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
TWENTY- ONE. Spend some time alone.

~~A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.~~

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2009-10-17T11:05:00.001-06:00

Have you ever wondered if the one dollar bills in your wallet were ever in a stripper's butt crack?

If not, you're wondering now. Have a nice day ..

So folks, always remember to wash your hands after handling money
That's my public service announcement for the day. Thank you very much! - it’s only ‘cuz I care!

Have You Gotten Your Flu Shot?

2009-10-15T07:44:00.002-06:00

The First Half of this makes sense, but I like the second half better.

Eat right!

Make sure you get your daily dose of fruits and veggies.

Take your vitamins and bump up your vitamin C.

Get plenty of exercise because exercise helps build your immune system.

Walk for at least an hour a day, go for a swim, take the stairs instead of the elevator, etc.

Wash your hands often. If you can't wash them, keep a bottle of antibacterial stuff around.

Get lots of fresh air. Open doors & windows whenever possible.

Try to eliminate as much stress from your life as you can.
Get plenty of rest.

OR

Take the doctor's approach. Think about it...When you go for a shot, what do they do first? They Clean your arm with alcohol...Why? Because Alcohol KILLS GERMS.
So.......
I walk to the liquor store (exercise)

I put lime in my Corona (fruit)

Celery in my Bloody Mary (veggies)

Drink outdoors on the bar patio (fresh air)

Tell jokes, laugh (eliminate stress)

Then pass out (rest)

The way I see it...

If you keep your alcohol levels up, flu germs can't get you!
My mother always said, 'A shot in the glass is better than one in the ass!'

Live Well - Laugh Often - Love Much

Caution: May Bring A Tear To Your Eye

2009-10-10T15:17:00.001-06:00

As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other 20 children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant. It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big 'F' at the top of his papers.
At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surpriseTeddy's first grade teacher wrote, 'Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around..'
His second grade teacher wrote, 'Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle.'
His third grade teacher wrote, 'His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest, and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken.'
Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, 'Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class.'
By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper that he got from a grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist.. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, 'Mrs.. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to.'
After the children left, she cried for at least a n hour. On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her 'teacher's pets..'
A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.
Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in life.
Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.
Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer.... The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD. The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom. Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.
They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, 'Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference.' Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, 'Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you.'

(For you that don't know, Teddy Stoddard is the Doctor at Iowa Methodist in Des Moines that has the Stoddard Cancer Wing.)

Warm someone's heart today. . . pass this along. I love this story so very much, I cry every time I read it. Just try to make a difference in someone's life today? tomorrow? Just 'do it'.
Random acts of kindness, I think they call it!

'Believe in Angels, then return the favor'

Hell Explained (By A College Chemistry Student)

2009-09-26T14:46:00.001-06:00

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls
are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.  As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes  over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two  must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.  The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct.......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night,
Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

Children's Thoughts On The Ocean

2009-09-24T11:14:00.001-06:00

1 - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6)
2 - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6)
3 - If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island. If you don't have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. (age 7)
4 - Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend any more. (Kylie, age 6)
5 - A dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy, age 8)
6 - My uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and pots and comes back with crabs. (Millie, age 6)
7 - When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would have been better off eating beans. (William, age 7)
8 - Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids. They are beautiful and I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get pregnant? Like, really? (Helen, age 6)
9 - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby brother is always crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age 6)
10 - Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves in to chargers. (Christopher, age 7)
11 - When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small. (Kevin, age 6)
12 - Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Divers can't go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky, age 8)
13 - On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because water fired right up her big fat ass. (Julie, age 7)
14 - The ocean is made up of water and fish. Why the fish don't drown I don't know. (Bobby, age 6)
15 - My dad was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean. What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom. James, age 7

Afternoon Delight.....

2009-09-22T20:30:00.001-06:00

The only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon 'quickie' with their 8-year old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony with a Popsicle and tell him to report on all the neighborhood activities.

He began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation:
- 'There's a car being towed from the parking lot,' he shouted.
- 'An ambulance just drove by!'
- 'Looks like the Anderson's have company,' he called out.
- 'Matt's riding a new bike!'
- 'Looks like the Sanders are moving!'
- 'Jason is on his skate board!

- After a few moments he announced, 'The Coopers are screwing!!'
Startled, his mother and dad shot up in bed! Dad cautiously called out, 'How do you know they're screwing?'

'Jimmy Cooper is standing on his balcony with a Popsicle.'

Truly heartwarming, isn't?!!??!?! ;-)

Random Thoughts For The day

2009-09-19T13:11:00.001-06:00

I have received these thoughts before, but I am crediting Autumn (Autumndaesy) for this hilarious (and sometimes true) fodder since she is the one I most recently received it froms! Thanks Autumn! Everyone read and enjoy....I am sure that you will find truth to many! (possibly most of them!)

*I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
*More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.
*Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
*I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?
*Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
*I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
*The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.
*Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.
*There is a great need for sarcasm font. { }
*Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f*** was going on when I first saw it.
*I think everyone has a movie that they love so much; it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
*How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
*I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
*I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
*The only time I look forward to a red light is when I am trying to finish a text.
*A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.
*Was learning cursive really necessary?
*Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say."
*I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
*Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.
*My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.
*Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart."
*How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
*I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
*While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.
*MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
*Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
*I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.
*Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
*I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
*Bad decisions make good stories.
*Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!
*Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?
*If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.
*Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from; this shouldn't be a
problem....
*You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
*Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.
*There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far. (This one is way too true!!!)
*I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
*"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.
*I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?
*While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA . No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don't win, they are executed.
*I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
*I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
*When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
*I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.
*Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
*As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
*Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
*It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.
*I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
*I think that if, years down the road when I'm trying to have a kid, I find out that I'm sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.
*Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.
*en under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my a$$ everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...
*My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?
*It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.
*wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.
*I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
*I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.
*The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat b@st@rd before dinner.

Bedtime....Always Fun!

2009-09-16T10:50:00.002-06:00

School is finally in full swing. Having said that, I think my kids are still on the summer schedule. Around our house, bedtime is 9:00pm. (My husband wishes it was 7:00) I have come to the conclusion that if I want my darlings in bed by 9, I'd better start herding them in that direction around 7:30 and then maybe, just maybe things will fall into place. My children are the masters of distraction. When I say it is time to get ready for bed, they head towards their room and then shut the door and get lost in the TV. When they are that quiet I forget (for only a moment) where I have sent them and why but, nonetheless, am enjoying the peace and quiet. When I finally go back to check on them I get crazy because they haven't done one thing that I have asked. Seeing the crazy in my eyes they hop to (or pretend to) and get ready for bed. Apparently they have a condition that doesn't allow them to go to sleep unless I have tucked them in. (and it has to be ME, not even Dad will do at this point...I think it may all be part of their devious plan to avoid bed) After many mooches and hugs and tucks (and I say MANY because if I give an "incorrect" hug or mooch we have to start all over) I finally get out of there and by now it is usually past 9:30. What procrastinators......(I think I have worked with people with this same condition!) Funnily enough, it doesn't end there. After I get them all to bed and have made it to bed myself, there is nothing like the feeling you get when you are just drifting off and you open your eyes and you have your nine year old 2 inches from your face. She has, yet again, heard noises and wants to sleep in our room. I tell her ~~that there are 3 other people sleeping in the room with her...if the boogy man does show up she needs only to outrun her brothers and sister~~ that I don't care but she has to sleep on the floor. I only let my kids sleep on the floor in my room. You would think that this would discourage them from it......not my kids. When I get out of bed in the mornings I get to run an obstacle course of bodies. All of my kids sleep with their blankets over their heads so if I happen to step on someone I can usually tell who it is by the noise they make. I have accidentally step on a few of them and you would think that would discourage them....not my kids. And don't even get me started on what it is like trying to explain to the husband why I am "not in the mood".....it is very hard to get the romance going with all of your previous "creations of love" just waiting to question your every move......I can't wait until bedtime tonight....maybe I will start the proceedings at 6 tonight......

Amazing Simple Home Remedies

2009-09-15T09:11:00.001-06:00

THESE REALLY WORK!!
1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.

2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.

3.. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER.

4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

6. IF YOU ARE CHOKING ON AN ICE CUBE, DRINK A GLASS OF SCALDING HOT WATER....PROBLEM SOLVED

7. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.

8. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.

Does God Exist?

2009-09-12T07:42:00.001-06:00

First off I want to say that I am not a bible thumper (and I don't hold it against anyone who is) and I know that by using that term I am not being "politically correct", but I received this from one of my best friends who is going through a tough time right now and I just wanted to share it with everyone else. I don't care if you agree or disagree, I just really like the message behind it.

This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain and suffering that I have seen...
A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.
As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said: 'I don't believe that God exists.'
'Why do you say that?' asked the customer. 'Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist.
Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people? Would there be abandoned children?
If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain!
I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things.'
The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.
The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.
Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard.
He looked dirty and unkempt. The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:
'You know what? Barbers do not exist.'
'How can you say that?' asked the surprised barber.
'I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!'
'No!' the customer exclaimed. 'Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside.'
'Ah, but barbers DO exist! That's what happens when people do not come to me.'
'Exactly!' affirmed the customer. 'That's the point! God, too, DOES exist! That's what happens when people do not go to Him and don't look to Him for help.
That's why there's so much pain and suffering in the world.'

BE BLESSED & BE A BLESSING TO OTHERS!!!!!!!

Who Doesn't Like Funny??

2009-09-11T09:26:00.001-06:00

First of all, I would like to say GOD BLESS AMERICA and all of those who gave their all and all of those that were left behind......I will never forget!

As I said before, I LOVE funny!! Who doesn't?? Really? Why would you not love funny? I love telling stories about my family that is humorous (or maybe you have figured that out by now) or about people who aren't family....just about anything and everyone I guess. ANYWAYS, sometimes I don't always have a great story to tell, but I always have an endless supply of emails that can be quite funny but also the ones that make you just wanna scratch your head and say, huh?? So in the spirit of keeping things funny, I decided to share some of my emails......look at it this way -- you can read the funny on here or I can clutter your email inbox with such nonsense! (I try hard not to get too crazy with the emails...I am sure that people dodge me in public for enough reasons....no need to give them one more! HA)
****Life is short....ENJOY the funny!****
**********************************************************************

WOMEN'S ASS SIZE STUDY

There is a new study about women and how they feel about their asses.
The results were pretty interesting:
30% of women think their ass is too fat...
10% of women think their ass is too skinny...
The remaining 60% say they don't care, they love him, he's a good man, and
they wouldn't trade him for the world.
**********************************************************************
A cop stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit, so he asks the biker his
name.
"Fred", he replies.
"Fred what?" the officer asks.
"Just Fred," the man responds.
The officer is in a good mood and thinks he might just give the biker a break and write him out a warning
instead of a ticket. The officer then presses him for the last name. The man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it.
The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it.
"Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?"
The biker replies, "It's a long story, so stay with me. I was born Fred Dingaling. I know - a funny last name.
The kids used to tease me all the time, so I stayed to myself, studied hard and got good grades.
When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency,and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Dingaling, M.D. After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through school, got my degree, so then I was Fred Dingaling MD, DDS. Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my
Assistant and she gave me VD, so now I was Fred Dingaling MD DDS, with VD.
When the ADA found out about the VD, they took away my DDS, the AMA took away my MD, and the VD took away my Dingaling, so now I am just Fred.

The officer walked away in tears, laughing.

Who Knew????

2009-09-10T10:10:00.001-06:00

Yes folks....people really do think like this.....YIKES!!!

How would you pronounce this child's name?

"Le-a"

Leah?? NO.

Lee - A?? NOPE.

Lay - a?? NO.

Lei?? Guess Again.

This child attends a school in Livingston Parish, LA.. Her mother is
irate because everyone is getting her name wrong. It's pronounced
"Ledasha". When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she
said, "The dash don't be silent."
SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember
to pronounce the dash.
If they axe you why, tell them the dash don't be silent.

Kinda brings a tear to your eye and a lump in your throat, doesn't it?

No Parent Left Behind.....

2009-09-09T10:57:00.001-06:00

As I write this I am NOT saying that I am perfect.....I am far from it. BUT, how can you not laugh at these?? They were written by parents! I guess maybe they need a "no parent left behind" law!!!! ;-)
I promise you cannot read these and not laugh out loud or throw up. These are real notes written by parents in the Memphis school district.

Spellings have been left intact.

1. My son is under a doctor's care and should not take PE today. Please execute him.
2. Please exkuce lisa for being absent she was sick and i had her shot.
3. Dear school: please ecsc's john being absent on jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 and also 33.
4. Please excuse gloria from jim today. She is administrating.
5. Please excuse roland from p.e. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
7. Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
8. Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
9.Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
10. Please excuse ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
11. Please excuse Lesli from being absent yesterday. She had diahre dyrea direathe the shits.
12. Please excuse tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea, and his boots leak.
13. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
14. Please excuse jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.
15. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because i don't know what size she wear.
16. Please excuse jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday. We thought it was Sunday.
17. Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
18. My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.
19. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
20. Please excuse mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
21. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.
22. Please excuse brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor
23. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sorethroat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever an sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.

A Few Of Life's Lessons...

2009-08-31T11:15:00.003-06:00

I received an email a while back that was written by a 90 year old woman named Regina Brett. I scanned it and thought it was cute but never really "read" it. I received it a second time and actually took the time to read it. There are few of them that, no matter how hard you try, you feel you might not be able to accomplish but it can't hurt to at least make the effort! I hope you enjoy this as much as I did! Life is short......LIVE IT!!!!

A Few Of Life's Lessons....

1) Life isn't fair, but it is still good

2) When in doubt just take the next small step

3) Life is too short to waste time hating anyone......(amen!)

4) Your job won't take care of you when you are sick...your friends and family will...STAY IN TOUCH!

5) Pay off your credit cards every month (or at least make double the minimum payment)

6) You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree

7) Cry with someone. It is more healing than crying alone

8) It is OK to get angry with God...he can take it

9) Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck

10) When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile

11) Make peace with your past so it won't screw up your present

12) It's OK to let your children see you cry

13) Don't compare your life with others. You have no idea what their journey is all about

14) Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God doesn't blink

15) Take a deep breath; it calms the mind

16) Get rid of anything that is useful, beautiful or joyful

17) Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger

18) It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else

19) When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer

20) Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion; today is special.

21) Over prepare and then go with the flow

22) Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple (mine is the hair!)

23) The most important sex organ is the brain

24) No one is in charge of your happiness but you

25) Frame every so-called disaster with these words "In 5 years, will this matter?"

26) Always choose life

27) Forgive everyone everything

28) What other people think of you is none of your business

29) Time heals almost everything. Give time time

30) However good or bad a situation is it will change

31) Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does

32) BELIEVE IN MIRACLES

33) God love you because of who God is, not because of anything that you did or did not do

34) Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now

35) Growing old beats the alternative....dying young

36) Your children only get one childhood

37) All that truly matters in the end is that you loved

38) Get outside everyday, miracles are waiting everywhere

39) If we all threw our problems in a pile along with everyone else's, we would grab ours back

40) Envy is a waste of time; you have all you need

41) The best is yet to come

42) No matter how you feel...get up, dress up and show up

43) Yield

44) Life isn't tied with a bow but it is still a gift

Creative or "Special"?

2009-08-26T14:35:00.010-06:00

I love humor. I love funny things, especially things that make me laugh out loud. I will admit that I have been know to laugh at other people's pain (i.e, falling out of a computer chair and hurting their elbow or whacking themselves in the shin or back of the head with a golf club....oh wait, that was me) In the event of "painful" funny I will at least make sure that the said object of humor isn't gonna die before I break out in hysterical laughter. I have a sister who is really bad about laughing at pain which leads me to wonder if it wasn't inherited. (possibly from out paternal grandfather.....he was a funny old coot!)

The reason for my title Creative or Special was due to the fact that my boys were playing dress up and i caught a few pics on camera....(cell phone so please forgive the quality). They were pretending to be monkeys which is why they have gloves on their feet. I had to laugh at Gabriel because he looked like a "chicken-monkey" because the hat that he was wearing made him look like he had a thingy on his head like a rooster!

One story that ALWAYS makes people laugh is the one about the flaming marshmallow. Long story short, we were visiting friends and their friends at their camp. I was roasting marshmallows and Al thought it would be funny to grab the stick I was using. We starting fighting over it like 2 little kids when the inevitable happened. Al let go and it snapped back in my hand which sent the flaming marshmallow at the other end sailing through the great big sky....all the way to the top of one of the other camper's heads. Unfortunately for her she wasn't wearing her hat and it glopped right into her hair!!! We all watched it happen in slow motion....you know how it is --you can see the end result but you just can't do anything to stop it even though it seems like you would have had plenty of time!! (Kind of like when you are running in a dream but you never really seem to get anywhere!) For anyone that was watching me and Al, they saw us drop that stick like it was on fire! I couldn't even blame it on him because he pointed the finger at me first! Looking back on it.........2 grown adults fighting over a stick with a ooey gooey marshmallow on it -- who didn't see that coming??????

P.S....Speaking of laughing outloud -- have any of you ever met my good friend Jenny??!?

Summer's End....Happy or Sad??

2009-08-14T11:29:00.009-06:00

With summer coming to close I find myself happy and sad. Happy (very, very happy) that school is starting again but sad that golf will be coming to an end. I have come to look forward to my Wednesday golf night with the ladies. A big part of the fun is spend a few hours with my extremely hilarious sister-in-law Autumn. (yes -- of Autumn Daesy blog fame) Her and I share a unique flair for being able to carry on a conversation consisting entirely of movie quotes. At times not an easy feat but highly entertaining....to us anyways! Some people just look at us like "What the hell are they talking about? Are they high?" Yes. we are high on life....and beer and wine! Beer for me and wine for her...for those of you who HAVEN'T heard the story -- I found out the hard way that 1) wine and golf don't go well together (unless you are an experienced wine girl like Autumn) and 2) I should never attempt to drink Autumn drink for drink! I am not saying that she is a wino or alcoholic.....more like experienced -- (who we kidding Autumn, you could hold your own when drinking with pirates!) I often wonder if I wasn't adopted because I don't have the ability to drink like the rest of my family, but I feel that I am getting better at it! I can actually drink a beer (without tomato juice) and not gag...in fact, I will often have another! Now that I have gotten side tracked by the whole drinking aspect of golf, let us talk about the other part of golf.....safety. Frankly, I feel that Autumn must secretly fear for her personal safety every time she gets into that golf cart with me! (and if she don't she probably should!) The part that I find funny is that no matter how many near brushes with death we have had, she still makes ME sit in the driver's seat! Now that is courage! Women like her should be in the military....I can hear her flash back story to the grandkids now....."Yeah, I was in the war. But I was never more scared then that time when I almost lost my leg golfing with your Aunt Heather. She was a squirrely one....never knew what she was gonna do. I would go left and she would too, in the cart. Always had to be on your toes around her. Sometimes she wouldn't even wait for me to get into the cart before she would take off....or make me scoop up balls from the cart at full speed! You ask why I ain't afraid of the Taliban? Because, Sir, I golfed with Heather Myrstol!" To all of you who

enjoy the game of golf......May your balls fly straight and may you never lose the pink one!!!!

My favorite golf buddy!

My new golf beer!

Yes, Virginia....I Am Still Alive!

2009-07-30T13:56:00.022-06:00

Hello again! To all my loyals....yes I am still alive! I don't really have a lot of words to say but I am posting some pictures of what has been happening with us this summer! I hope you enjoy them and I also hope that I will be finding more things to write about...I miss writing my blog!

Gabriel's 4th Birthday

Gabe helping Dad take down the Christmas lights.....in June!

Can you see my black eye?

Madison's 9th Birthday

The swimmin' hole

Slip N Slide

I want one!

The cousins!

The ladies love the cool guy!

Candy Scramble at the kart races!

Vacation sure wears a guy out!!

You Ever Been So Nervous You Wanted To Throw Up?

2009-05-27T10:35:00.008-06:00

I felt that way every time I had to give a speech or do a demonstration in school! But this isn't about me, it is about my Emily. Ever since the softball season started this year she has been telling me that she wants to be a pitcher. She mostly plays outfield or second base but last night was THE night! She finally got to pitch for the first time! We were playing against a team that mostly had little girls on it and only the ten year olds were supposed to pitch, but the coaches talked it over and decided that it would be ok for Emily and a fellow teammate who is also 11 to pitch. I think they allowed it because neither one of them had ever pitched before! I think what made her the most nervous was that she was our first pitcher on the mound and didn't have a "guide" to follow! She actually did quite well for her first time! She got a few strikes and managed not to hit anybody. (hey...that is doing good in my book) She almost got a girl out at home plate and she even got a hit that took her to second base! To top the whole night off the coaches only gave out 1 game ball last night and Emily got it! I hope last night was the just the boost she needed to finish out the season strong! Thanks to our game tonight in Livingston I will be missing my first night if golf league....We are so proud of her and we hope she does well! Until next time....

BUSY! BUSY! BUSY!

2009-05-22T08:53:00.022-06:00

I hate when I let so much time lapse between posts, but April/May/June is always super busy for us with all that the kids have going on and the end of school nearing! We have been on the go for softball since the end of April and it will last until the 2nd week of June. Two weekends ago my husband, my mom and dad, 2 friends and I went to Anaconda to a bowling tournament. How did we do, you ask? If there had been a trophy for drinking we would have brought home first! Last weekend, we packed up the family and headed to Alberton for our 2 oldest boys' graduation...one from high school and one from 8th grade! (1 outta high school and 5 to go!)

In lieu of all the craziness, I have decided to post some pictures of our latest happenings....I hope you enjoy them! In case I don't get back on here before Memorial Day, I want to wish you and yours a happy and safe holiday!

Our Softball Queen

What up, dude?!

One cool guy!

Emily singing in the Spring Concert

Emily's 1st place at the Art Show

Another fun day at our house...

Blaine graduated! YEAH!!

Graduation after party

Yes, that is part of a potty training seat!(Luckily it was brand new!)

Band-aids fix everything!

Madison's field trip to the zoo

More zoo (shouldn't the monkeys be in a cage? ;-)

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

2009-05-08T10:47:00.004-06:00

Since I will be getting to spend Mother's Day this year in a bowling alley with my mom, I am taking this time to wish all of the mother's (the kind with children.....) I know a very Happy Mother's Day!

I don't know about you all but Mother's Day in my house is a little different than those depicted on television! On TV they get diamond earrings and necklaces. At my house I get a pumpkin plant that didn't even make it home before it got uprooted and died...and I get a vase made from soup cans that holds a beautiful array of paper flowers....and I get a tastefully made T-shirt with designs on it. (as of this post I haven't got to see the shirt yet but was told to act surprised when I get it) I get cards that say Happy Mother's Day in scribbles (you have to be a mommy to able to read it) and I get dandelion and weed bouquets that sit in a glass of water on my kitchen table until I get tired of wiping up all of the stuff that falls off and finally throw them away. (It can be quite devastating when the little ones realize that you have thrown their gift into the garbage) I get homemade picture frames with my kids' pictures in them and I get hugs and kisses.

These are the kinds of gifts that make being a mom special and I wouldn't trade them for all of the diamonds in the world!

Again I say, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to all!

Is Something Wrong With My Kids??

2009-05-01T09:11:00.003-06:00

Or is something wrong with their mom? Let me explain.....
I was never really much of a coffee drinker until I met my husband. I drink more than my fair share now, but I am not your typical coffee drinker either. I could drink straight black coffee if I was dying of thirst (which if I was you would think that I would opt for something cooler) but find it to be a much more enjoyable experience if I add sugar and cream. (I know that most people say "cream and sugar" but I say it in the order of which is more) ANYWAY, when my oldest child was little she got a taste of my coffee and liked it. After that she thought that she should just have coffee every morning. I would fix it in a sippy cup that was 1 part coffee to 3 parts milk. (at least she was getting her calcium) Well, when Madison came along she had gotten a hold of the sippy cup a few times and she decided that she liked it too. From then on it became a morning ritual to wake the girls up with their "coffee". I began to question this ritual when they started to lay in bed and yell out "Coffee". When people (mostly relatives) would hear the story of how my children drink coffee every morning they would say "aren't you afraid it will stunt their growth?" First of all, I think that is an old wives's tale and secondly, they are Myrstol's.....do you really think it matters Eddie?!?!
A few years later along came Gabriel. Yup, you guessed it....he also acquired a taste for the "java". When Rollie came along, he too has joined in the family tradition! There are days that I watch my youngest play and wonder "I hope that the coffee is not what made him just trip over that blade of grass or make that bad decision to stomp on the cat's tail!" I think maybe that might have something to do with just being a boy! I don't think the coffee (mostly milk) can be all that bad....when we go to the doctor they never ask, "does your child drink a lot of coffee?" I don't see how a little bit of coffee can be any worse than pop or candy. Yes, I am one of those mom's that let her children eat candy and drink pop.....but DEFINITELY not for breakfast....that is when they have coffee!

Here Spring, Spring, Spring! Come on Spring!

2009-04-29T13:26:00.003-06:00

In an effort to will positive thoughts to Mother Nature to just allow spring to happen, I have changed the layout of my blog page. I am trying to "Think Spring!" I love daisies, so I was pretty stoked when I found this layout! I think it is really fun and vibrant....just like me! ;-)
I may sound like I am grasping at straws but I need all the positive reinforcement that I can get right now. I would say that I am far from being depressed, but this weather is really starting to get the best of me! I went crazy with a paint brush and starting painting most of the rooms in my house a few months ago. I have many more plans for painting and "spring cleaning" (which is really just hauling A LOT of useless crap to the dump to make room for more useless crap!) but I have really lost my motivation this past week. I wake up every morning with big plans and then I look out the window! I really only need a couple of days of sunshine in a row and I would be back in business!!!!
Don't even get me started on softball.....there should be a rule that games can only be played if the temperature outside is 60* or above! (I know, I know....we will be complaining about the heat before too long) The girls had their first game this past Monday and Aye Chi WaWa!! (I know -- not spelled right but you can still sound it out!) Their game got cancelled last night (Thank God) and the jury is still out for Friday's game.....come on sunshine!!!!!
I have been trying to get the motivation to go paint my bathroom or "spring clean" all day but to no avail. Then about 1 hour ago the sun came out and I felt like I could jump up and get everything I wanted to done and then some....amazing what 5 minutes of sunshine will do for ya! And yet here I sit blogging instead.....I must be screwed up from the time change! (Isn't that what everyone blames there troubles on?!?!) Everyone help me count to three......1...2...3....Here I go!

Yeah! For Happy Hour, I Think.......

2009-04-23T09:53:00.004-06:00

For all my Facebook friends that saw my page last night and for anyone else who missed it......I celebrated Happy Hour again yesterday with a good ol' Costco sized bottle of wine. (again) I stopped at my sister's house to visit and we decided that a nice vat of wine was a very good idea. Well, after it took me 1/2 hour to go from 5th street to the Grand to fetch the wine, it really did taste good. I told her that I just wanted a quick glass so that I could get home to cook supper. Well, 1 hour and 1 large bottle of wine later my phone went to ringing! It was the husband! I let my sister answer my phone. When he asked her what we were doing she said, "We are sitting here watching...(a slight pause) absolutely nothing on TV. I should probably mention that we had been listening to music and the TV wasn't on. She failed to notice that little detail before she tried to pull the wool over his eyes! HE decided that he was gonna stuff his pockets with some cans of beer and head on over. WE decided that he needed to go to the Grand and get more wine. Well, he liked the wine so much that I am pretty sure that he drank most of the second bottle by himself. (darn him....that is my favorite wine) We then decided that it would be a good idea to go uptown to pick up some pizza for dinner. A few beers and a couple of pizzas later we were on our way home. I decided that it would be a good idea to stay up for a bit and drink a couple 5 gallon buckets of water (and maybe a few Advil) so that I would wake up human in the morning. (Lucky for me 2 of my kids decided to wake up in the middle of the night.....if nothing else, at least I was able to whiz out a couple gallons of that water I drank) I decided that I would check Facebook real quick and see what was going on! Well, apparently I was in the mood to take 100 of those dumb quizzes that are hardly ever right, but at least now I know that if I ever want to get a part in the movie Twilight or Van Helsing I apparently am a werewolf. If I decide to be a superhero I could become The Flash because it says that I can run at the speed of light. (The people that made up this quiz obviously never had gym class with me) If I were a symbol on a totem pole I would be the owl.....it has amazing vision bringing the gift of insight -- its about time someone besides me realized this. (I guess it could have been worse...I could have been the hyena....what do you think, Ed?!) And last but not least, I found out that if I were and evil leader I would be most like Adolf Hitler, the 2nd most evil leader. I wonder who the most evil leader was......
I also apparently have a deep secret love for Bob Barker because I quoted him. You have to admit, it really is a good message he was trying to send and who doesn't love The Price is Right?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! or a spritely 80+ year old?!?! If only I were 50 years older I would be all over that!!!!!

At The Risk Of Exposing My Secret Identity.....

2009-04-05T10:44:00.008-06:00

If you are familiar with Facebook then I am sure that you have encountered the "name generators". These are the nifty little "applications" (as seen on Facebook) that ask you to insert your real name and in turn they generate a neat little "secret" (for lack of a better word) name. Thus, why it is called "name generators". At the risk of exposing my secret identities, I wanted to share a few of my "secret" names.

If I were to become a stripper (with the economy in the toilet it could happen if my kids keep going to the dentist) my name will be "Tiffany Sparklevelvet". It is an interesting name but hearing the name Tiffany would always make me think of teen sensation of the 80s. (I am not sure if she was really a sensation, but I shamefully admit that I liked a few of her songs)

If I were to become a villianess my name will be Manic Hellcat. I suppose if I get angry enough I could do the name justice, but I was thinking more along the lines of "Crazy-eyed House Frau". (get it? Because I am a stay at home mom?!?!) Although, it would be fun to tell your friends that your mom is the "Manic Hellcat".

On the other hand, if I were to become a superhero my name will be "The Charismatic Inferno". I can be quite charismatic and was a bit of a pyromaniac when I was younger and again I say, how cool would it be to tell your friends?!

If I were to become a pirate they said my name should be "Captain Soggy Beard of the pirate ship Fruity Sailor. It is nice to see that they made me a Captain but if I am going to gain any kind of r-e-s-p-e-c-t from the crew I will have to go with something like "Captain Crazy-eyed Biotch". (you best be fearing the eyes!)

When the Smurfs come calling for the new 102nd smurf, I will join the cast as "Vulgar Smurf". Vulgar?! Me?! Maybe in my younger years but I try to be a good mommy! (snicker, snort)

If and when I decide to take over the job of the Easter Bunny I will become "Cadbury Choco-paws". Let's hope that I don't eat my own my own paws....if that happens I will NEVER get the eggs delivered!

And last but not least, If I am to become part of the Mafia (who am I kidding, I will take the whole damned thing over) you will then know me as "Sammy Crazy Eyes Pistone". (What is up with the crazy eyes?!?!)
If any of you happen to encounter me while I am in the disguise of any of these secret identities, please just smile politely, nod and then walk away.....if you don't I may just have to kill you....no sense in putting my family's safety at risk!

Is 3:00pm too early for "Happy Hour"?

2009-04-02T10:07:00.004-06:00

I must be becoming a victim of cabin fever. Happy Hour hit my house at 3:00 yesterday afternoon. Before you judge, let me explain.
First of all, anyone that knows me knows that I am far from being good at drinking. I don't think that I even classify as a "social drinker".....I drink little enough that when people do see me drinking they say, "OMG! Heather is having a drink?" (they don't really say OMG, that is for texters, but I didn't want to offend anyone by saying the G word. Although, the fact that I was drinking at 3 in the afternoon may offend some people so I guess I can't please everyone;-) ANYWAY.....I was given a large (large as in the size that they use in a bar) bottle of my favorite wine as a gift. I should have just put it in the fridge (yes I said fridge because my favorite wine is fruity and much better when it is chilled!) and continued on with my day, but the kids were already home because they got out early yesterday, so I thought "What the heck?" So I cracked open the bottle with the intention of just having one little glass. I drank one glass and decided to have just a scoch more and I spilled most of it while I was telling a story. ( Again I say, anyone that knows me knows that I talk with my hands. In fact, my family always jokes that I would probably never be able to talk again if I were to lose my arms in an accident! It may seem morbid but it is actually quite true and funny! You can't always get your point across by trying to use your shoulders as hands! LOL!) Well, between my sister an me we managed to finish the whole bottle. Had I drank that bottle by myself I doubt I would be sitting here writing this....I would probably be sleeping in my bathroom very near the throne! (I told you I was a bad drinker) I managed to only drink enough to make me REALLY tired. I got the family fed and put to bed and I was so tired that I was sure that it was like midnight. Turns out that it was only 9:00pm. (which is actually close to our real bedtime.....are we getting old or what?!?!? At least we don't eat dinner at 4:00) I woke up feeling good (Thank G!) but I have decided that I am still bad at drinking........but don't we all deserve to let loose once in a while?!?!?!

I am SOOOO SICK of sickness......

2009-03-30T11:11:00.003-06:00

Whose with me? Anyone? Anyone? If you are a mom with sick kids I bet you will agree. If you are a mom that has kids that has escaped the barrage of illnesses that have been floating around all winter, I hate you. Did I say that out loud? I meant to say that I am jealous of you. We had a pretty good start to winter but then the below temps kicked in and our heater started running non-stop! Did I mention how much I hate forced air heating? Don't get me wrong, it is great for when you are freezing your butt off and you need to get warm ASAP! On the other hand, it is drier than a Montana prairie in the middle of summer! It doesn't seem to matter how many humidifiers you have running it is always dry! I guess we could go to plan B....My husband told our kids that we couldn't afford the heat bill so we were going to buy everyone in the family a Snuggie and turn the heat off. (not to be confused with underwear up the butt.....at least that is what we called a "wedgie" in our house when I was growing up) A Snuggie (as seen on TV) is a blanket with sleeves....seems quite practical actually....I almost got sucked into buying one after watching a commercial for it when I was up late one night with a sick kid! (Infomercials are very dangerous to a bleary-eyed mom at 3 in the morning!) The kids actually thought that the Snuggie idea was pretty cool!
The other thing that really chaps my hide is making the decision of "how sick is sick enough to go to the doctor?" MY kids (and I have heard that it is quite common among most youngsters) have a knack for getting better the second I make the appointment and re-crashing and burning as soon as we get home again. (It's like when a woman hears a noise coming from the car but when the husband, mechanic or husband/mechanic tries to hear it they can't and again you are labeled "crazy" for hearing things) Then there is the ol' catch-22....If you don't think they are "that bad" and you don't take them in, you are a bad mom....but if you do take them in and they are "fine" then you are a/an (insert adjective of choice here) mom who apparently has nothing better to do than waste your doctor's time. I know it sounds horrible but sometimes secretly you wish that the doctor will find something wrong so that you don't seem crazy. I know that kids still get sick in the summer but at least they aren't trapped in the house and (if your kids spend as much time at the pool as mine do) hopefully all that chlorine in the pool will kill some of the germs!
So I say again, who's with me? Can I get an amen sister?!?!?! (how about a babysitter?!?! ;-)

TA! DA! My attempt at a Lightning McQueen bed

2009-03-26T11:18:00.010-06:00

Well here it is. I finally finished the boys' bed last night. They are pretty excited about it....I hope that excitment carries over to bedtime tonight!! Please forgive the quality of the photos....my digital camera is broken so I had to use my phone! Ka-Chow!!!!!

Another "baby item" bites the dust....

2009-03-23T09:29:00.003-06:00

Another milestone was hit in our box of heaven yesterday. I finally made the executive decision to surrender the place of mom and dad sanity where our sweet little one lays his head every night. (and sometimes during nap time) In case you are confused, we got rid of the crib. This is a decision I have been struggling with for a while now. Every time I would venture into his room to survey and try to make a decision I always came up with the same solution....let's leave him in there just a little bit longer. After all, he hasn't even tried to climb out yet! Our oldest could climb out when she was one, our 2nd oldest loved the crib and would probably still be in there if we had let her (did I mention that she is 8) and our 3rd child got booted out when he was not quite 2 to make room for little brother. There are only 3 bedrooms in our little cracker box....master for mom and dad, 2nd biggest room for sisters and the littlest room for the brothers. When one of the brothers is a little baby, it is hard to try and teach the bigger (but still little) brother how to be quiet while little brother is sleeping. Our solution to that (and I would say probably not a very good one) was to have big brother sleep in our room on the floor. He didn't mind since he got to watch T.V. (yes we have a T.V. in our room too) My husband grew tired of this idea quickly so big brother now gets to sleep in his sisters room. For the most part this has actually worked out well. Now that little brother is out of jail he is in the sisters room as well. He is not a pleasant room mate because he thinks it is cool to be with other people at bedtime which he sees as playtime. This means that I don't get much sleep because of all the "M-A-W-W-W-W-M'S" coming from the other end of the house. There is a set of bunk beds in the boys' room that we are going to try to employ. Right now they are painted white with pink and purple flowers on it. (Brings to mind a humorous image when you picture my 2 teenage stepsons sleeping in them!) Both little boys are in love with Lightening McQueen so we have decided to paint the beds red with maybe a lightening bolt or 2. Hopefully this will get them excited to sleep in there.....and if that don't work......you guessed it -- there is always the T.V.! (Please don't judge....its all for the sake of sanity!) I know the girls will be happy! Well, looks like I have some painting to do!

Now if I can just get the little one out of diapers!

My List of Firsts

2009-03-18T09:32:00.006-06:00

I was reading through some of my old posts and I liked this one. I wanted to rerun it for fun.......the sad part is that nothing in it has changed from when I first posted it. I know that I didn't travel back in time to change anything but I still hit the snooze button this morning, my husband was the first person I talked to this morning and no one has called or texted me yet......I'm not sure but there may be a pattern developing here......

Who was your FIRST pet? The first pet I remember as a kid was a blue tic hound named Freda. She had BIG floppy ears and was always baying at the moon. I remember one time when she tangled with a porcupine and mom had to pull the quills out with a pair of pliers! Wonder what happened to that dog.....

Do you still talk to your FIRST love? no

What was you FIRST job? My first job I got paid for was babysitting but my first real "had to have an interview" job was at the IGA

What was your FIRST car? The first car I had to drive after I got my licence was our HUGE station wagon. Needless to say, I didn't go out driving much.

Who was the FIRST person to text or call you today? No one yet!

Who was your FIRST grade teacher? Miss Loftus

Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane? To California

Who was your FIRST best friend and do you still talk? I would say Aurora....no

Where was your FIRST sleepover? Don't remember

Who was the FIRST person you talked to today? My husband

Whose wedding were you in for the FIRST time? My oldest sister's (does sitting at the guest book count?)

What was the FIRST thing you did this morning? Hit my snooze several times

What was the FIRST concert you ever went to? Nitty Gritty Dirt Band

FIRST set of stitches and how? I think it was when I cut my finger while trying to separate frozen side pork. I ended up getting stitches in my toe the same day I got the stitches in my finger taken out! Good thing I am graceful!

FIRST piercing? My ears when I was 13

FIRST foreign country you've been too? Does North Dakota count?

FIRST movie you remember? STARS WARS (I remember because I held hands with a boy I liked through the whole movie in a room full of kids and tried really hard for no one to see that we were holding hands under a pillow! ;-)

What was your FIRST bike? I got a reconditioned bike that was painted blue and had a new banana seat that looked like denim.....it was AWESOME! My brother taught me how to pop a wheelie on it but after I fell flat on my back it didn't seem quite as fun!

What was your FIRST computer? A Gateway that I ordered over the phone!

Who was your first roommate? I never had a roommate

FIRST kiss? Same boy from the Star Wars movie....different night

Did the world stop?

2009-03-17T10:20:00.003-06:00

Oh wait. It was just the universe that swirls above our little box of heaven that we live in! Our computer modem went out Sunday morning and that meant the end of the world to our 2 oldest children! They were "SOOOO BORED!" and "HAD NOTHING TO DO!" Besides the weather not cooperating, we have all been sick so that just adds to the happy feeling surrounding this place! Also at this age, it would be preposterous to play with your sister or brothers! It is much more fun to irritate mom and dad or fight than just get along! The girls got into a fight Sunday night over whose job it was to run the remote to the T.V. (yes, they have a T.V. in their room) They sleep in bunk beds with the oldest on the top bunk. When the hula-baloo broke out my husband went back to see what happened. Madison wanted Emily to push the play button on the remote to start the movie. When she refused (the remote wasn't in her hand, therefore it was too difficult to comply with her sister's request) Madison got up out of her bunk and stepped up on her bed to hit her sister for not doing what she "ever-so lovingly" asked. She was so set on getting "revenge" that she didn't even bother to get the remote and push the button herself or even just go directly to the T.V. (That reminds me of the time that we lost the remote to the T.V. in the living room and ended up watching something dumb because no on wanted to change to channel manually)
I won't lie, it is a little tough for me when the computer is down, but I don't use it for anything important like taking care of virtual pets like my girls do. I just use it to pay bills and write blogs. (and the occasional facebooking) After waiting all day yesterday for they cable guy to show up between 10 and 2, I finally called again and found out that he would not be showing up until the next day. Well he showed up right as I was walking out the door to take the kids to school so we were almost late. (For those of you that know me that know me know that I would have been there sooner but.....) The kids hovered around him like he was the coolest guy on the planet! Of course he was......he saved the day by restoring our link to the outside world! Thank you cable guy.....what would we do without you?!?
Have I ever told you how much I like summer?..........Until next time....

Saying goodbye to the binky!

2009-03-13T09:14:00.006-06:00

When my 2 older kids were little they had no interest in a binky. (that is what we call a pacifier in our house) If only I had taken that as a sign that I should not have even bothered to introduce one to my 2 youngest! When my 3 1/2 year old was a baby (and yes, he is a boy!) he was hungry ALL THE TIME! Or maybe he just liked having a boob in his mouth! He is, after all, a male! When he was six months old I got sick with the flu and he had to stay with my mom and we used a pacifier to help out. He also got introduced to formula because I COULD NOT nurse while I was throwing up.....I didn't want to risk dropping him in the toilet! Anyway, he ended up falling in love with his binky. We broke him of it on his second birthday. (his little brother was born 3 months before his 2nd birthday and he had already been ousted from his crib.....no need to kick a guy when he's down!) Everything went really well until I had to be in the hospital for 4 days when our youngest was 5 months old and the kids stayed with Grandma again. Thus, the binky resurfaced but for the littlest guy this time. Turns out that older brother rediscovered his love for his long-lost binky and started stealing it from him on a regular basis. Little brother didn't seem to mind too much since he wasn't quite as in love as big brother.......yet! I went back to work for a few months and that is when the binky became his best friend. I will admit (sadly) that for a short time they both had one because it was just easier to let it go than to hear them scream. As our youngest approached his 2nd birthday (which was this past February) we decided (and by we I mean my husband) that enough was enough....NO MORE BINKY! I took them away (and by took them away I mean I didn't completely get rid of them. I hid them.....just in case) the day after his 2nd birthday. We had some pretty upset boys and 1 slightly frazzled mom (from all the crying....did I say crying? I meant screaming) for a few days
but I still needed a way to break them for good. A friend told me about how they broke their child. You cut the nipple off of the binky. That way they can see that it is "broken" and no longer usable. The hope is that this will make more sense to them than saying, "you can't have it because I said so!" (I wish I could use this logic with my older children!) Well, I cut the nipple off of one and gave it to my son and boy was he UPSET! Even the older one got mad.....how would he ever steal it now? There were tears, but I think we finally got them both to understand. Sickness enter here....the next week everyone in the house got sick with a cold. Our youngest was the worst and he REFUSED to sleep! (Have you ever seen a 2 year old on a bender? Me neither but I am pretty sure that he could have been a poster child for that campaign!) This was only making him sicker so I caved and gave him his binky back. (What?!? This was a serious case of "just in case") After he got some sleep and was on the mend I told myself that I better take it away again before he heads off to college. Long story short.....I didn't have to. Big brother hid under a blanket with some scissors (good thing I had an eye on him....but in my defense they were child safety scissors!) and cut the nipple off of the last binky in the house! So far so good.....we will have to see how nap time goes! Farewell dear Binky! You have been a great friend! We will miss you!

Come One, Come All.....

2009-03-12T11:56:00.003-06:00

Yes this was also the title of a post in my other blog, "Are You Smarter Than A Stay At Home Mom?" I am writing this with the hope of getting more readers to join me! Like I said in the other post....it doesn't matter if you know the answers off the top of your head or if you google them, but the fun part is posting them! Who doesn't have 5 minutes to exercise your brain with useless facts? The great part about them being useless is that you don't need to retain the information! This is NOT a test....I repeat....this is NOT a test :-) Please join me and have fun....and feel free to tell your friends!

Trying something new....

2009-03-09T09:15:00.005-06:00

When I first read my sister-in-law's blog I thought it looked like fun so I thought I would give it a try! I thought with four hellions (did I say that out loud? I meant to say my lovely children) and a like minded husband surely I would have plenty to write about! Well the stories don't seem to flow as easily as I thought they would! So in addition to this blog, I have decided to try a new one.....I love trivia and little know facts that know one else seems to know or care about. (half of the time I am not sure how even I know some of this crap!) My hope is that even if my trivia can't make you smarter, it might make your mind a little less bored! (I have been told that my mind wanders a lot -- maybe that is why I like dumb trivia:-)

So the question is, "How much useless trivia do you know?"

Blogger, Blogger. Where for art thou, Blogger?

2009-02-16T07:33:00.004-07:00

In the past few weeks I have been asked (in regards to my blog) if I have fallen off the face of the earth. Hmmm....let me check....nope still here! I would like to take this time to apologize to my legions of fans who have been saddened by my absence and I hope to make up for your disappointment ;-) Most of you know (but for those of you that didn't) that my most recent employment was with a local meat shop. Well (as far as I know) my last day was last week so I will finally be able to devote more attention to my dear blog!
I have to say, another thing that may be a bit of a distraction for me is this thing called Facebook. Have you seen this thing? Of course you have....who hasn't?!?! I tried to sign up with it a long time ago (right around the time of its birth) but I DID NOT understand it! So a little while later I tried my hand at Myspace. Slightly addicting and much easier to understand. Although, I think it may be the cause of some of the "debris" that has cluttered my computer! When my dear Uncle passed away last October, we reunited with some dear relatives. I decided then and there that I am going to make a conscious effort to stay in touch with family better! While gathering the necessary information so I could enforce my new cause, I found out that they don't myspace that much in SD but more of the Facebook. So I, once again, rejoined Facebook (which turns out can get pretty confusing for your friends and family when you have 2 accounts ;-) I will admit that it can still be slightly confusing at times but it is SUPER ADDICTING! I find myself saying all the time (in my head) "I will just sit down and check my page for a minute.....I don't have time to sit here all day." Then I find myself 2 hours later trying to get 2 hours worth of work done in 30 minutes!! For all of you fellow Facebookers out there....YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! I can hear all of you saying now, "I don't know what she is talking about. I can quit anytime I want to!" Don't feel ashamed I feel your pain and remember....life is short and the laundry can wait! (unless you are completely out of clothes to wear and are still in your pajamas because that is all that is left!) **LIVE LIFE! HAVE FUN! LOVE OFTEN! LAUGH SO MUCH THAT PEOPLE THINK YOU ARE CRAZY!**
My name is Heather and I am a Facebook-aholic! Until next time....

What Christmas means to me....

2008-12-24T07:39:00.003-07:00

First of all, I would like to apologize to my 3 faithful readers for going so long between postings. I was hoping that when I started this blog that I would be able to come up with something to write about at least once a week. Well, with 4 kids and a husband there is usually some funny story floating around but to be honest with you it is TIME that has been my downfall lately! With Christmas coming the day after Thanksgiving this year I have been on the go constantly! So with all of the political crap that goes with the "Holiday" season, I would like to take this time to tell you what Christmas means to me!
If I were to give a child's account of Christmas using my adult mind it would be something like this...Christmas is like have S_X for the first time with a new boyfriend/girlfriend....(not that I would know now, I have been HAPPILY married for the last 10 years.....maybe the rules have changed!) You wait...anticipate...wonder...by the time the actual time for "opening presents" is upon you, you can hardly stand it! Then you rip and tear your way to the peak of your excitement and then amongst the rabble you wonder to yourself, "That's it? That's all I get?" It doesn't really matter because 10 minutes later you forget the whole thing anyways!
Now that I am an adult Christmas means something different to me. I love the lights and the music and the food and the family gatherings, but I could care less for presents. When I was a kid there were 5 kids and not a lot of money. We had a beautiful tree and plenty to eat every year. Our gifts were usually a hat and pair of mittens or a cool pair of jeans with our initials sewn on the pockets in our favorite color....MADE BY OUR MOM!! We usually didn't get store bought gifts unless we spent Christmas with Grandma and Grandpa. There are 2 Christmases that always come to mind....One was when I was 5 or so we spent Christmas at my grandparents house. I got a baby doll (which I played with until everything fell off) and I remember sitting outside trying to see Santa's sleigh and trying EXTREMELY hard to stay up and catch a glimpse of the big guy himself! I still swear to this day that I saw him in their hallway!!!! My other favorite one was when I got an awesome pair of pajamas from a family friend for tutoring her son and I got a barbie doll in a yellow dress from Santa. That same Christmas my sister got a "Pretty in Pink" barbie doll from Santa and I am pretty sure that we played with them until their arms and legs fell off!
I sometimes wish that Christmas was more simple like in the "olden days". You put up lights, have dinner with family and friends, you have a great time at the yearly Christmas program (Santa always came and gave away candy when I went to country school), you have a blast playing in the snow during Christmas Vacation, you bake or make gifts from the heart, and you are TRULY THANKFUL for everything that receive!!!!
I want to take this time to wish you and yours a very MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! May God bless you and I hope all of your dreams come true in 2009!!!!

Milestones for the new generation....

2008-11-14T09:01:00.008-07:00

This ain't Dr. Spock's milestones! My kids have reached all of the normal marks....crawling, walking, running, talking. As far as height and weight go, they have always had the odds stacked against them. You see, I was a chubby child and my husband's family is notorious for "their lack of height." (they are not short....they just aren't tall)
The new milestones I am talking about are the ones that most parents DON'T want to talk about. At least not outside the realm of other parents. Gabriel and Rollie have learned how to use everything imaginable as a gun! Everyone would like to consider themselves a perfect parent who does all the right things, but it can be a little embarrassing when your little angel picks up a (insert any inanimate object here) and pretends to shoot (insert the name of anyone they encounter) and proceeds to tell them that they are going to shoot their face off! That is just AWESOME! My girls were never like that so this has been an interesting avenue for us. I also love how they love to take things apart without the knowledge of putting it back together! Gabriel's new favorite thing is to turn everything into a chainsaw! That is all well and good until he tries to saw little brother in half without his permission! Which brings me to my next milestone....fighting! My sweet, cuddly, angelic little baby boy has turned a corner....he is now training to become a World Wrestling Federation wrestler! I guess after being sawed in half one too many times for your liking you have to learn how to defend yourself! He was always the sweet innocent one but has now become the one who is constantly being tattled on for being mean. He has become quite good at the hair pulling and the all-too-uncomfortable punch to the back. (that is big brother's favorite) For the past couple of days the 2 boys have developed a new favorite game....spread out blankets (for what I am guessing is a wrestling mat) and go to town walloping one another. I guess they need to get that energy out somehow (and I don't see either one of them becoming a concert pianist or a world famous painter) so I usually let it go until the crying starts. Now if I could just get them to learn how to refold all of the blankets and put them away.....(hey a mother can dream)
Other than being caught and explaining the whole S-E-X thing to your kids, (which is a whole other story entirely) my absolute favorite milestone that a child can reach is when they learn how to cuss! Oh, the memories! Gabriel's favorite new word is the F-word....and I am not talking farfignugen! He will be playing away and he will call little brother an F'er! NICE! My husband and I were talking one day and he said it and we both stopped in our tracks. When I asked him, "what did you say?" He said it again with perfect annunciation....I guess we all need to be good at something -- Gabriel's is the art of language! It is even better when they say these words in public....in front of people....who hear them -- good times!!
I know that there are more great milestones to come....I have 2 brothers and I was witness to many acts of "brotherly love" (which usually involved the big brother pounding the little brother) and I have heard some great stories of "brotherly love" shared between my husband and his little brother -- I truly cannot wait! (I also have 2 sisters with whom I shared a little "sisterly love" from time to time....just ask my little sister) I think all brothers and sisters share this loving bond...."That which love makes the bones grow stronger" -- the new credo for all siblings everywhere! Until next time....

Christmas already??

2008-11-08T08:32:00.004-07:00

You may have noticed the new background...(yes I know it is Christmas-y) but it could have been worse. I could have chosen the one with Santa Claus on it (which was pretty cute) or the reindeer but I chose to go conservative and picked the wreaths because I figured that if you REALLY stretched your imagination that maybe, just maybe, Thanksgiving could fall under this page too! (Isn't a wreath good for any occasion??)

I am a girl that loves the holidays...Christmas and Halloween being the top 2. I wasn't on the ball to put up a Halloween page and there is just no time to do a Thanksgiving one. As for Christmas, that holiday seems to be getting longer and longer every year! I am pretty sure that I saw a few Christmas displays in July!!!! If only I was one of those super organized people that can shop for gifts a whole year in advance....imagine the money I could save and the lack of stress. I am sure if I did that I would end up like Clark Griswold....always hiding the gifts and then finding gifts from previous years! I could just start stocking up a vast array of gifts when everything goes for 99% off the day after Christmas, wrap them and then just pull out a gift when needed. That way it will truly be a surprise for all! Although, Grandma might not enjoy getting the size 6 boys underwear and I doubt Grandpa would enjoy a pair of toddler snow boots. Maybe I will just start giving away beautifully wrapped empty cardboard boxes. Haven't you ever heard people say, "Little kids end up liking the boxes better than the toys that come in them anyways!" Imagine all of the $$ of I could have saved if I had thought of this sooner! It could also be a great character builder....teach your children early that they don't always get what they want and how to make lemonade out of lemons! LOL!!!! Or I could just give a one year memberships to the Jelly of The Month Club....that is the gift that keeps on giving the whole year!

I am the 4th of 5 kids. As I was growing up (back in the stone age) I don't remember there being ad after ad after ad for all of the crap that they are trying to sell these days. I also don't remember watching that much T.V. when I was a kid. As a mother I have learned how to listen politely and smile while they ramble on about the bajillion things that they want for Christmas and try to filter out the one or two things that they ask about all year. So far their lists are short but I am sure that once the T.V. ads hit full stride I will have to put on my game smile (and ears) and get ready for battle.

Don't even get me started on the decorating. I used to live in a fairly good sized house with ample wall space for my MANY (did I mention many?) decorations. Now I live in a slightly smaller house (more like cracker box--but we love it) and have tried, for the past 2 years, to fit said decorations (or as my husband calls it....crap) into it! Ask him sometime how much he LOVES to put up the outside lights!!! I am sure that he could just gush about it for hours! I know that he can't wait to do it again this year because he has already mentioned it for the past 3 weekends..... or it could just be that he would rather hang them with a slight breeze blowing (yes 70 MPH is considered slight around here) instead of in a blizzard with gale force winds! Either way he knows that I will make him do it so he might as well make it easy on himself! It could be worse....we could still live in the other house -- here is a picture of it so you understand what I mean! (now imagine what the inside looked like :-) Until next time....

A Tribute To My Uncle...

2008-11-02T11:05:00.007-07:00

Monday, October 27th, 2008 was a very sad day for our family. We lost my Uncle Darrel to cancer. As you know, I usually try to fill my posts with humor and even in sadness there is humor to be found. I would like to dedicate this post to everyone everywhere that was ever touched by Darrel in some way and especially his family.

You know the part of the funeral when the pastor asks if there is anyone who would like to say a few words? Well, like everyone else there, I sat there staring at my hands wishing that someone would say something but mostly wishing that I had the courage to say something. Had I gotten the courage this is what I would have said.....

"This body lying here before us is not Darrel. This is only his earthly vessel that transported his soul through his journey here on earth. His earthly vessel, like all good vehicles, eventually broke down and could not be repaired. He became so tired that even his love for his family wasn't enough to keep him with us. It was the love that he felt from the ones who passed on before him that finally allowed him to relent and let go. Even though his physical self is not here for us to touch that does not mean that he is not here spiritually. Have you ever found a penny on the sidewalk or somewhere random and thought, "I wonder why no one else has picked this up?" The reason they haven't is because it was put there for you. It is a fun way for a loved one to let you know that they are with you. The day of the funeral we had to stop and put gas in the car. When I got out, there on the ground was a penny. I picked it up and knew in my heart that it was from Darrel. For those of you that attended the funeral, you heard Dawn's touching story about knowing the exact minute that her dad had passed. When she told that story all I could do was sit there in amazement. Afterwards, I told her how much that story hit home. At the same time that she was jolted awake by her dad's passing I was having a dream about him and his dad. (my grandpa) I dreamt that I went to visit him in the hospital and they were in the same room separated by a curtain. I felt it to be more urgent to talk to Darrel first so I went to his side. As we sat and talked his frail body transformed back into the Darrel that I have always known. I then got up and went to talk to Grandpa and all he did was smile and wink at me and then I woke up. I knew right then that he was safe and surrounded by love."

When I was young, Darrel, to me, was always the uncle that looked just like my dad and seemed to love to wear slacks. He was the uncle that lived in Buffalo, WY, was married to Aunt Janice and was the dad to Brett, Dawn and Craig. We almost always stayed at their house on the way to visit in South Dakota. When I was older, he used to come to our house almost every Tuesday to visit with mom and dad. (he was always in town that day for his work) I will be the first to admit that my younger sister and I always made sure that we were busy on those nights because they would sit around and "reminisce the old days" and, as teenagers, we really didn't understand or care at the time. Until you are older and/or have kids of your own, you don't really understand a lot of things. I find that the older I get the more important family is to me. When I was younger I never really thought about death. I just figured that everyone close to me would be alive forever. In realization, no one does live forever in the physical world but be assured that we will all see each other again someday.

I did say that even in sadness there is humor to be found, so I would like to share one of my funniest memories of him. This was a story that I heard him tell a long time ago so if you know details that I don't, please forgive me if it is not exact. He said that one night he and Janice were in bed sleeping. He had heard a noise so he got up to check it out. It turns out it was a cat that they had. He came back to bed and turned out the light. Not long after that he heard another ruckus and the next thing he knew that cat came tearing up the bed and running right across his face. He started cussing and turned the light on. He felt something on his face and he soon discovered that the cat had a touch of diarrhea and had drug his tail right across his face! I'm sure Janice had a good laugh that night! As I said, some of the details may not be the same but this is a story that makes me laugh EVERY time I tell it or think about it!!!!

I, for one, TRULY believe that there is life after death and that our loved ones are always communicating with us. As I sit here writing this, my oldest daughter Emily came up to talk to me. I had been thinking about Darrel and Janice's house in Buffalo and I happened to look down at Emily's shirt and noticed the name Buffalo on it! This is a shirt that she wears often (which means I wash it often) and I had never noticed that before! There are always signs.....just be open to seeing them and you will.

Rest in Peace Darrel Dean LaVoy. Keep sending me signs until we meet again....

Can you understand what I am saying?

2008-10-23T11:24:00.005-06:00

My last post inspired me to write a tribute to all of you who are able to speak and, more importantly, understand the wonderful language of cartoon/movie lingo! You all know who you are or if you are just beginning to realize your new God given talent....welcome to the club! As I said in my last post I have a knack for memorizing movies, TV shows, cartoons, songs....you name it! Lucky for me my younger sister and one of my older brothers can too....it makes for really fun conversations! I find it funny when people think we are speaking "in code" and all I can say is, "are you serious Clark?" (one of my favorites!) Just last week we were at an anniversary party (an oldies dance) and my sister had her 5 month old with her. In true movie lingo fashion my sister-in-law (truly a queen of this game in her own right) walked up to my sister and said, "Look at you. You have a baby....in a bar!" CLASSIC!! Kudos to you A.D.! (I hope you pick up on the initials A.D. and if you don't -- are you serious Clark?)
At work we put the wrapped meat into trays with our customers names on them. Last week we had one customer, Martha, who had a lot of meat so we came across her name often. Every time I saw it I couldn't help but say Martha Focker. By the end of the day I even had my sister and niece saying it....too funny. I was also in the freezer a lot that day and, (for those of you that don't know -- eyeglasses tend to frost over when exposed to warm air after being exposed to extreme cold), I came out one time and my sister asked me if I could see. All I could think of was, "She'll see it later Dear. Her eyes are frozen!"
So to all my loyal fans....remember to check your shitters and don't go falling in love my R.V. cuz I'm taking it with me when I leave next month! Until next time....
P.S...Be on the lookout -- future posts will more than likely contain more of my favorite lingo!

YO! GABBA! GABBA!

2008-10-23T09:53:00.006-06:00

For those of you that have children, I am sure that you have heard these words before. For those of you who have not....let me enlighten you. Yo Gabba Gabba is a weird cartoon that comes on Nickelodeon ever day. It starts off with a guy coming out in a very fashionable orange jumpsuit thingy with a furry hat to match. (where can I get me one of those?) He is also carrying a big boom box which leads me to believe that he is some sort of DJ. He opens up the boom box and it is filled with his puppet friends. When he talks to them they come to life and they proceed to role play various child related situations, e.g. sharing, personal space, personal hygiene etc. I get the feeling that they are supposed to resemble space creatures because I have never seen any such creatures on this earth. Even though I find the whole show mildly disturbing my kids seem to love it...I will admit that once I hear it I usually have the Yo Gabba Gabba stuck in my head for the day! (It makes me wonder if we played the show backwards what kind of subliminal messages we would hear :-) I guess it could be worse....they could bring back the Teletubbies! They were popular when my second oldest was a baby....if you know what I am talking about, need I say more? I sometimes think that I see/hear too much of this channel....I don't encounter too many other adults that go around singing, "I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, "I'm the map, I"M THE MAP!" I guess the thing that really bugs me about that cartoon is how it is her show but she never really seems to know where she is going.....she constantly has to ask my kids for help! It is hard to explain to a little toddler why Dora can't hear them through the T.V. Another good "stick to your brain" cartoon is the Backyardigans! I am pretty sure that I have had dreams about those weird kids....and you can't close the subject without mentioning the "king" of them all -- SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS! I must admit that the first time I saw this one I thought, "What the H-E-double hockey sticks is this?" But after hearing it in the background all the time I got used to it and eventually started watching it. Now I watch it even if the kids aren't around. I know that my co-workers think I am crazy because they don't seem to understand when I speak "spongebob" to them :-) Kid movies are not any better! I have a great knack for memorizing an entire movie (which will happen when you are forced to watch something at least a 100 times a day -- "can we say Barney?") and then recite it every time I watch it! My kids LOVE when I do this! Funny how they can hear me reciting a movie but they can't hear me ask them to clean their room or brush their teeth! Until next time....
P.S. I almost forgot my other favorite "wad of cartoon gum" that sticks to my brain...."WOW! WOW! Wubbzy! Wubbzy! Wubbzy! WOW! WOW! The kids really love it when I say that OUTLOUD -- ALL THE TIME!

I found something better.....

2008-10-18T12:14:00.005-06:00

I never thought I would say this but........something better than being trapped in the house with kids is................all four of them yelling and fighting with each other! That means that everyone is back to normal! As I sit here writing this, the two middle ones are crying and yelling because the oldest one ran off next door to their cousins house without them. Can you say "nap"? Baby brother is just wandering around quietly trying to get big brother's helmet on. I have to be honest, my 2nd oldest darling is quite notorious for her "sometimes unpleasant to be around" attitude. As I said before, I have been home all week with her and her illness. It may sound mean but I guess I was hoping a little that her high fever would possibly melt away a little bit of her "not so nice" side. Well I think that her siblings will attest to the fact that said miracle indeed DID NOT happen. Thus, as I said, everything is back to normal! I hate to cut this short but I just saw my 3 year old jump the fence to catch up to the big kids and I suppose I better go get him! Or maybe I will wait 5 minutes to see if they bring him back.....I think I will pick door #2 and enjoy my 5 minutes of peace and quiet! Until next time....

P.S. Here is a picture of my three year old in his usual every day attire! Talk about casual! The helmet is a new addition for the day (maybe to protect himself from darling #2) and check out that salute! I think the neighbors (and anyone who has driven by my house) enjoy watching my children play and enjoy it even more when they realize that they are my children and not theirs :-) -- especially when my 3 year old drops trow and sprinkles a little art work around the yard any time the mood strikes! I guess when you gotta go, you gotta go! I can't wait until he teaches that one to his little brother....Yeah! Memories! Even with all of the fighting I wouldn't trade my kids for anything......What's that? A free trip to Hawaii? Hmmmmm....Let me think about it!

What could be better??

2008-10-16T15:36:00.005-06:00

Our little family was scheduled to travel to western Montana this morning to watch my two stepsons play football. On Monday my middle darling came home at lunch time because she had a headache. I thought for sure that she would be fine after a day or two....not so and she ended up at the doctor yesterday. Of course the usual happened.....she was sick enough for me to want to take her to the doctor and while we were there I am sure the doc wondered what we were doing there. Normal temperature and everything else, just like all my trips to the doc. (but then crashed again after we got home) I usually don't get too ruffled when my kids get sick but when I took her temp once it said 105!! "Surely that cannot be right!!!" I thought! I took it a few more times and it was finally consistent after the 10th time of taking it! (I am sure she wouldn't have minded had she known where/how they used to take a temp) Lucky for me she only vomited one time during this whole ordeal and it was on the linoleum so at least there is that! As for my question...What could be better?? What could be better than being trapped at home with a sick (but on the mend) child and two other little ones who are just waiting to get it? I say trapped because the doc says it would be better to keep everyone inside. What makes that so hard is that the weather is actually nice and snow free! (I still have my suspicions that playing in the snow last weekend might have had a helping hand in our demise!) My husband and oldest darling went on to the game without us....at least someone gets to go outside! Hope they have fun! To all moms that experience similar situations this fall/winter....I feel your pain! (This may be the first illness of the season but I fear it won't be our last) Until next time....

Ever get one of "those" emails?

2008-10-09T12:43:00.003-06:00

You know the ones....they ask a million questions about your personal life so they can "get to know you" when, in fact, they are usually sent to you by someone you have known all your life. Don't get me wrong, I have been just as guilty about sending such emails out as anyone and I usually fill out the ones I receive and send them on, but instead of sending out another email I will just write it here so you all can get to know me......pay close attention for I am very complex.

1.) Are you a boy or girl? I am a girl. 2.) How old are you? I am older than 25 but younger than 40 and will be for a few more years. 3.) Are you married? I am married to a guy.....how many times? A lady never tells -- or at least I am not going to. 4.) How many kids do you have? I have given birth to 4 delightful (hehehe) children....if you believe this statement you have not had the privilege to spend a great deal of time with said children. People say, "you must really love children to have such a big family now a days!" Nope, the husband and I just couldn't quite figure out what kept causing it! 5.) Do you have a job? For the past 4 years I have had the good fortune to be a stay at home mom. (for those of you familiar with this job you know that it requires more than the supplied space here to write a more accurate description) But I have recently started working a few days a week at a local meat locker.....interesting place to work if you are wanting get rid of any enemies....that is another story! 6.) Do you have any hobbies? I love to cook....when I am in the mood, otherwise frozen pizza is always good in a pinch. 7.) Do you have any interesting habits? People think I am a neat freak....freak maybe but they need to come by after both boys have been home and bored all day. 8.) Do you dye your hair? My answer would be...I'm sorry, have we met? 9.) Do you love pets? As long as they don't belong to any of my children, thus meaning that yours truly is responsible for them. We have tried owning several pets (mostly dogs) and luckily we have found loving homes for all of them! We do have one pet left that has been with us for 9 years, our cat Blackie, although some days I wonder if she was someone who had done wrong in a past life and was reincarnated as our cat as punishment! 10.) Do you like diamonds or pearls? No one I hang out with can afford either and if they can then they have been holding out on me! 11.) Are you funny? I like to think that I am, although I am sure that there are a few people that would disagree! 12) Have you ever eaten roadkill? Ummmm....no I don't think so. 13.) What is your favorite color? I like them all man.....these mushrooms in my spaghetti taste funny! 14.) What is your favorite number? With my shrinking brain I am just glad that I can count to 10 (sometimes higher on a good day) 15.) Hugs or kisses? Both as long as they are not a surprise from the weird guy that lingers around the bus stop. Well I could go on forever but if I reveal all of inner secrets then I won't have any answers left for when I get the next one of "those" emails! Until next time....

Good thing I am not a vegetarian....(or work for PETA)

2008-09-28T15:36:00.004-06:00

Because if I was I don't think I would last very long at my new job. Yes, I said J-O-B! I decided that being a stay at home mom wasn't challenging enough so I decided to take a stab at working at a nifty little meat locker called Pioneer Meats. Did I mention that I have been out of the work force for about 4 years? Lucky for me I didn't have to deal with "being the new guy" jitters since I, once again, work with one of my sisters and my mom when she isn't watching my 2 youngest. Come to think of it, I can't remember the last time I had a job that I didn't work with at least one of my immediate family! Gotta love that small town life!! Anyways, for those of you that have never actually been to a meat locker it usually has a distinct odor like no other. I used to say that I didn't think that there was any way that I could ever work in a place like that but, huh, go figure! Amazingly enough, once you are in the environment you don't really notice any weird smell except for the occasional "overly exposed to the elements" wild game!!!! HOLY GUACAMOLE BATMAN!!!!.....that is one smell that I think could be used on death row -- who needs lethal injection?!?!?! I spend most of my days in a little corner by myself wrapping meat. When I am not there you can find me in the freezer trying to find orders that are usually way in the back at the bottom of the most inconvenient stack!!!! Not a good place to be with 2o lbs of steel in your ears!....maybe I should invest in a set of ear muffs or one of those cool furry hats that you would imagine every person in Russia owning! (for those of you who don't understand....I have 7 steel earrings in each ear!) All in all it is a pretty cool job and I get along with all who I work with. Hopefully I will still be able to keep my Tuesdays free for "coffee" with the girls!! Until next time....

Another wedding in the books.....

2008-09-09T12:38:00.004-06:00

No...not mine -- 2 is enough for me! LOL If you ever find yourself not feeling your age and would like to feel A LOT older, I suggest you attend a wedding of someone you remember meeting when they were in the 4th grade. (I felt a little old even then) We attended my niece's wedding and, to quote Autumndaesy, "Man was it cold!" We went to the rehearsal the night before and let me just say......man was it cold! Three of our four lovely chitlins were in the wedding party. Unfortunately our little boy developed a horrible cold the day before and wasn't really down with being 1 of 3 ring bearers....I believe he missed out on the pictures but he did make it down the aisle -- right to where I was sitting :-) I was very thankful that the ceremony was short because it is not fun trying to get 2 little boys (and 1big one...the husband) to sit still and keep quiet. Lucky for the big boy it was an outdoor wedding where, apparently, drinking a can of beer during the ceremony is acceptable. (only in Montana!) Mother Nature thought it would be funny to wait until the guests were seated and then rain on us for a good 10 minutes....(thank God cousin Sandra went and got her umbrella -- she had said that she just knew that if she went and got it that it would stop raining! I just can't figure out why she didn't go and get it sooner!) Luckily Mother Nature relented....she sent down sunshine for Angie to walk down the aisle and held off the rain throughout the ceremony....and then it just got colder from there. Don't get me wrong, I love a good outdoor wedding as much as the next guy....I just hope that by the time my girls are old enough to marry that some geek somewhere will have figured out a way to control the weather! (Why not? They figured out everything else!) Congratulations to the newlyweds Angie & Jon Weatherman! Until next time....

What a difference a day will make....

2008-09-08T10:10:00.003-06:00

I am happy to report that my little boy decided that he likes school after all! He was a little nervous when we go there but after we stepped inside and bee-lined for the bathroom......while in the loo we had a little chat and he decided that he was going to be OK. I left my little darling behind with his new friends with a new sense of assurance. I never got "the call" this time and when I got there to pick him up he and all his new friends were playing in the sandbox. The teacher was excited to tell me that he drank his milk at snack time and even went potty for her! YEAH!!! (that is quite a feat in itself considering that he won't even go for his own dad :-) When it was time to leave, though, he again threw a fit -- only this time it was because he DID NOT want to leave school! LOL! I finally got him out of there kicking and screaming....let's hope tomorrow holds a better departure....The cutest thing is that when you ask him his name he says "6" and when you ask him who his best friend his he says "sandbox"! I love my special little boy :-) Until next time....

I found yet another who DOES NOT like school...

2008-09-02T14:04:00.005-06:00

My second middle darling! As stated in a previous blog, he was extremely excited to start school and totally bummed when he found out that it was not at the same location as his sisters. Today was his first day at "Linda's". He was pretty excited until, on the way there, I told him that he would be there by himself without brother and me. He started to get a little worried but was still excited to see what was on the other side of the door. When we got inside his "static cling" problem got worse....he was more clingy than one of those annoying dryer sheets someone else finds stuck to the back of your shirt. We made a short trip to the bathroom and then settled in at a tiny table with microscopic chairs for a little "getting to know the place" time. After a few minutes he was comfortable enough for brother and I to leave and my last mental picture of his was a happy one. School runs from 8:30 to 11:00am. I was feeling pretty good about it all and was just saying so to one of the husband's sisters when I got "the call". Hello Mrs. Myrstol....your son had an accident (number 1, thank goodness!) can you bring some dry clothes? "I am on my way"! I then ask myself, "You knew this would happen...you should have just put the extra clothes in the backpack like you planned!" ( I knew this would happen because he as stubborn as a mule not because he likes to pee his pants!) When I got there he was a sad little sight. He was sitting on the step stool in the bathroom looking lost and he started to cry when he saw me. While I was getting him changed, he kept crying over and over, "I don't like school, I don't like school!" All I could think was, "Kid, you've got a long road ahead of you if you dislike school this much this early!" My plan of "you need to go to school or we will have to take your bike back to the store" totally backfired on me when he wanted to hold open the car door so I could load up his bike! Please wish us luck for we are going to try it one more time this Thursday. Lucky for him they are all just little little kids so I doubt they will dub him as "the kid who peed his pants his very first day of school!" Let's just hope he get over his dislike for school and this episode doesn't repeat itself when he get to kindergarten and little kids' memories seem to be somewhat keener! Until next time....

Who doesn't love the first day of school?

2008-08-26T09:14:00.003-06:00

I would say most kids everywhere but it is a different story when you ask most parents :-)Yesterday was the first day of school for my two oldest. All summer long they talked about how much they hated school but also how bored they were! When we went school shopping they got pretty excited but it faded quickly! The night before the first day of school they, again, thought that school was dumb....mostly because it was the start of their early to bed schedule but come the next morning (after they finally woke up) they got pretty excited again! They couldn't wait to get there so we could inspect the class room and see where their desks were -- hoping that it was right next to their best friend! Well my oldest was happy with everything but my second oldest was already worried that school would be hard and and she might not make it through....and this was after only 10 minutes! She may have had a premonition of a bad day.....during her first recess of the year she got smacked in the eye by a runaway tether ball and she wound up with her first black eye! What a way to start the first day!!!!!
My third child gets to start preschool next Tuesday! He seemed to understand this yesterday but this morning he threw a full on fit when I dropped the 2 oldest off because he thought he was going too....bless his heart! I only hope that he has the same enthusiasm next week when he realizes for the first time that mommy doesn't get to go to school with you!!!! Hopefully the coming year will be smooth sailing for all!! Until next time.....

How not to race a car....101

2008-08-05T09:43:00.008-06:00

I say "how not to race a car" because I am pretty sure you can't get too far on your roof! Lol. The car in the photo is my brother's race car. He lives in Ree Heights, SD and races in Miller, SD just about every Friday night from Apr/May to Sept. This is where the last leg of our vacation took place a few weeks ago. The night we were there he just missed out on the trophy by about a 1/2 a car length but did end up with the infamous watermelon. On this night, I was told, he was again vying for the trophy when he encounter a little "car trouble". I was bummed when they said that the season might be over but was happy when we got the news that it was "game on!" Even if first impression tells you that the season is over an avid racer will find a way to come back!!!! Way to go Team LaVoy!!!! I used to live in Winner, SD and attend the races every weekend. I didn't realize how much I missed racing until I went to Miller Speedway!!!! As I said before....It may have been our first time there but I highly doubt it will be our last!!!! I send a BIG "GOOD LUCK" out to 4 LaVoy's Racing and I look forward to seeing a pic of you holding the trophy this weekend! (even if you get the watermelon it means that you stayed on your wheels :-)

Until next time....(P.S. these other pics are of the car in the daylight)

V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N........

2008-07-30T12:55:00.007-06:00

That spells vacation! My family and I recently went on an 8 day excursion called vacation. This trip was the longest time away from AND the most time we have spent together so closely as a family....I think ever. We all had our growly - don't poke the bear - moments but all in all I think it went well! We had to go invest in a dual screen DVD player for the car as the husband and I feared for all of our sanity. Unfortunately, our first leg of the trip was through Yellowstone Park and the DVD player was still new so most of the sight-seeing was done by the husband and myself. After spending the night in Cody we ventured over to Thermopolis to test out the "largest thermal hot springs in the world." We took the kids to a place called Star Plunge. For those of you who haven't been there......it was interesting. The inside pool seemed like it was over 100 years old but it was hard to tell because the minerals cause all that build up. The husband DID NOT care for the indoor pool because of the pleasantly unpleasant odor of bad eggs...aka...sulpher. Unfortunately for us that is where we spent a majority of the time since that was where the baby pool was. We did swim some outside and we rode the slides with the kids and we watched our oldest jump off the high dive (pretty good considering she claims to be afraid of heights) I know the kids would go back in a heartbeat but I don't think their dad shares the same delight. Our next leg of the trip took us to Rapid City, SD. We mostly chilled and swam at the hotel (correction-MOTEL......Motel 6 to be exact -- but at least it had a pool which is all the kids cared about) We played a quick round of mini golf at a great place called the Pirates Cove. Fun yes, but I am sure it would have been more fun if the kids attention spans could have been longer and our sweat wouldn't have been sweating! (Holy humidity Batman!!!!!) The next day we arose refreshed and ready for the day! After a quick breakfast we were off to be super tourists!! We started out by driving out to the Crazy Horse Memorial. Truly a great place, but again not too fun with short attention spans. The kids were mad that we didn't stop at Mt. Rushmore on the way back but if have picked up on my theme then you know why! My husband the antagonizer got a kick out of making them take a picture of the dead presidents out the window while we drove by!! LOL! We then ventured down to Keystone, SD.....Oh what a wonderful world! (If you own a tourist shop!!) It was all good though, since we went with the full intentions of being the best tourists we could be! We started at the Presidential Wax Museum -- a cool place, but again the attention spans. We also went to the Keystone School which is now a museum with an interesting display about Carrie Ingalls. Our oldest child liked it because she is reading those books and the littlest one liked it because he found some old chalk to eat in one of the class rooms. We also got to ride a tram (looks like a ski lift) up a hill and the baby and rode it back down while all the others got to ride down a huge slide. We tried to take a train ride....after we finally convinced the kids it would be fun to do we found out it was sold out!! Maybe next time!! After a much needed night's sleep we were off to a little town called Winner. (My family and I lived there for a year when I was a freshman in high school) My Uncle Wayne (he was married to my dad's sister) and cousins live there. My uncle and his wife took us out to dinner and we got to share our children's impeccable table manners with the other patrons.....you know I'm kidding, right?!?! LOL! After some visiting and touring of Winner, we headed over to Chamberlain and little town called Pukwana. Puk is a place where my dad's family lived. I liked visiting there when we were kids. By the way, if you ever hear of a place called Puk U......(dad used to tell us it was a school) there is indeed a place bearing that name. I am sure that you probably guessed that it was a bar! LOL! We left there and headed up to my brother and his wife's place in Ree Heights. We just hung out and visited the first day. The next day (after some needed sleeping in) we hung out with Andi (my brother's wife) and Jesse and Kaiti (their kids). We went to their AWESOME town pool (did I mention how awesome it was) and swam for a few hours before going to the races. (to watch my brother) We had a blast at the races and Doug did good. He won his heat and got 2nd in the feature.....by the way Doug, thanks again for the watermelon!! (it was pretty good) We decided to stay one extra day so we could go out and watch our nephew Jesse race go karts. It was pretty fun to watch!! Then we got up the next day at the butt crack of dawn and drove straight home....it was nice, the kids slept most of the trip! I think we all had a pretty good time and, for the most part, we all still like each other! LOL! We may just make the trip to SD a yearly thing.....I will have to settle for vacation because I don't think I can convince the husband to move there!!!! Hope your summer is going well!! Until next time....

BOOOAAAT FLOOOAAAT!!!

2008-07-15T12:45:00.004-06:00

If you are from Montana surely you have heard of the Boat Float! The husband and I, along with step-son, sister-in-law and 2 brothers-in-law floated the river from Big Timber to Reed Point last Saturday. Anyone who knows me knows that I am not really a drinker so I think it was a little bit of a shock to everyone when I cracked my first beer at 10:30 A.M.!!! Alcohol seems to take on a very different effect on the river. You can sit and drink all day and never really feel anything.....BUT when you stand up to get out of the boat -- LOOK OUT!!!! LOL!! I really wasn't having that much trouble getting out of the boat but getting back in....the sister-in-law and I (the only girls on the boat) always seemed to be on the end of the boat that required the most amount of work at any given time. I am a tough girl and don't want to complain but all the rotten boys at the other end of the boat weren't much help!! LOL!! Anyone who has heard of boat float knows that most guys (and I suppose some girls) go on it with the high hopes of seeing a boob or two......it's really just a bunch a boobs looking for a bunch of boobs! LOL!! I am sorry to report that the only boobs I saw were a a drunk chick at the street dance with an ill-fitting dress......(In all fairness the river was a little higher than normal this year so most everyone had a life jacket on so it makes it a little difficult to flash people when you are all bound up -- it somehow loses it's allure....kind of like a stripper falling off the pole in the middle of the dance!! LOL!) I did, however, see more than my fair share of good ol' man crack.......I think these guys should do the sit down test before they leave the house!!!! Anyways, all in all I think we all had a pretty good time and I am sure that we will attend again.....Hope your summer is going well!!!! Until next time....

10 fingers and 10 toes.....

2008-07-08T10:34:00.006-06:00

Well we managed to put another successful 4th of July in the books.....by successful I mean that we all have our important body parts still intact! LOL! As for our hosting duties....mission accomplished....we may even make it a permanent gig. Mother Nature couldn't resist having a little fun of her own, though. She waited until the minute we wanted to eat and let loose a big cloud burst! Where do people go when it is raining? Answer: inside. Ever see those potential Guinness record breakers that try to see how many idiots they can stuff into a little car? I am by NO MEANS calling my party guests idiots, but lets just say that my trailer house looked like one of those tiny cars! LOL! I will say that the brief rain made great weather for eating but it didn't take long before it got HOT & MUGGY! So much so that even the die-hard horseshoe players were having a hard time. Imagine my dad sitting behind a tiny tree for shade (when it wasn't his turn) and just when you would be getting ready to take your turn he peeks out from behind one of the three branches on the tree! OMG for the love of laughter--it was too funny!! Even with all of the pants peeing fun had by all, I am glad that there aren't any more holidays for a while. Unless you count the start of school but I think that is a holiday that only parents keep in their calendar! LOL! Here's to still having all 10 fingers all 10 toes! Until next time....
P.S...I got the staining done on the deck before the party--it only took 4 hours in the middle of the hottest part of the day--I think my husband was a little surprised! I will post a pic soon!

4th of July ALREADY?!?!?!?!

2008-06-30T13:17:00.005-06:00

Is it just me or does it seem almost impossible that it is the 4th of July already?! I used to think summer went too fast as a kid but I find that as I get older it goes by like that super fast train in Europe! (sorry I don't know the name --hehe--probably going to fast to read the name on the side anyway!) My mom is usally the one who throws the big 4th bash but since she has moved to a smaller house I get to do it this year. The funny thing is that I live in a small trailer house on the outskirts of town (probably about the same size as hers) but I have a fenced in yard (to protect any little ones from the occasional rouge horseshoe) and a new big deck -- the 9th wonder of the world, as stated in a previous blog. We are very proud of our deck but, alas, it still is not quite finished. My husband keeps reminding me that the unfinished part is the "finishing" (staining) part which was agreed in the beginning to be my part. So, I guess I better wrap this up so I can mow the yard, do the laundry, clean the house, take care of the kids, clean out the abyss we call our van, make dinner and plan for the 4th of July party so that I can do my part and get the staining done! HOPE EVERYONE HAS A HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!!! Until next time....

Wonder what 2nd place looks like?

2008-06-23T09:52:00.005-06:00

2nd place looks pretty darn good if you ask me or any other parent of the girls on our softball team!! Our team went into the tournaments with a bye because we were in first place but we lost our first game which meant we had to claw our way back up to play for 1st and 2nd. Then we had to play 3 games on Saturday and come back early Sunday for another! I know she won't decide until the very last minute (like everything else) if she wants to play next year and I will be fine with whatever she decides, but I sort of hope that she will continue with her softball career. I think she saw things differently towards the end of the season, especially during the 3rd game of the day when we had a tie score and she slid into home for the win! Not too bad for a girl that was always too afraid to slide before!! Now that softball is over the girls are pretty excited to get down to real summer business -- swimming and sleepovers! It is hard to believe that a month ago they hated school and in a month they will be asking when it will start again!! My second oldest darling had to endure tournaments on her birthday so we are having her party tonight. Which reminds me....I better go get her cake baked for the party!! Until next time....

Is is June or December?

2008-06-11T14:19:00.003-06:00

My oldest darling and I travelled to Livingston last night for one of her softball games. All day long I waited and waited for my phone to ring saying that it had been cancelled. I had good reason -- we had already suffered through a miserably rainy game IN Livingston the night before. Honestly, I would have taken the rain again over last night!!!! I am pretty sure that I saw snow on the way there. When we got there I waited in the car with a friend until the game started (or so we thought) and we decided that since neither of us had any of our other children with us that we would just sit in the bleachers this time -- the cold, hard, metal, small (barely big enough for a 6 year old butt to fit on) EXTREMELY UNCOMFORTABLE ones!! I kept wishing I had brought my comfortable chair to sit on but it was all the way back at the car and the car was about 20 miles away. (Our girls get the great privilege of playing in the back forty)
I was dressed for June with a sweatshirt when really I should have been dressed for December in my winter clothes! Silly me....I never thought to bring my snowsuit! The game finally got going and after a while the sun did come out for a bit....long enough to thaw my nose out. I even had to do the one thing that I always get after my kids for doing.....pulling my sweatshirt down over my knees! (I hate the shirts stretching out) That almost turned into a trip to the emergency room for me when my foot slipped and I fell forward. Had I not caught myself I would have smashed my faced right into the lower bleacher! After my friend stopped laughing she said that had that really happened she would have at least waited until she got to the car before she laughed at me! Now that is a TRUE friend! LOL. By the time we got ready to go, nothing on my body worked. Except, of course, my nose which wouldn't stop running! I had started shivering uncontrollably and all of my extremities were numb. It was an interesting walk back to the car. Despite all of that the game actually turned out to be a good one....we won and everyone played well. I can't wait for the next game...anyone want to go with me?? Until next time....

Is that sunshine I see?

2008-06-09T09:41:00.003-06:00

I woke up this morning and was pleasantly surprised to see an actual blue sky with no clouds and a ball of sun in it. Until I looked out the other side of the house and found the clouds! All in all it is still, by far, the best start to a day we have had in a while. They say (and by they I mean the people who seem to think they know how to predict the weather) that it is suppose to be nice without rain this weekend (I will believe it when I see it) so hopefully we will be getting the deck done! (I will post a pic of the 9th wonder of the world when it is finished!)
Besides the deck, we have another new addition to the household....my teenage bottomless pit -I mean step son - has come to live with us for the summer. I have 2 boys of my own, but they are still little and they aren't capable of consuming A LOT of whatever they eat....YET!!! I guess it is good practice for when they get older!! I guess, in a way, my 15 month old is practicing for the future -- you can open anything with a wrapper a good mile away and he will be at your side begging in nothing flat!! He really doesn't care what it is either....however, I don't think he will be begging for those jalapeno chip again anytime soon!! I better go.....something just crashed to the floor -- gotta see what it was and survey the damage -- I am guessing that the "invisible kid" named "NOT ME" did it!! Hopefully one of these days I will catch that darn kid in the act!! Until next time....

Rain, Rain are you gonna go away?

2008-06-06T07:21:00.003-06:00

Don't get me wrong, I know we need the rain and I personally like the rain but couldn't Mother Nature be kind and spread it out a little? I would be happy to endure a few 100 degree days if it meant actually getting some rain in July and August. Really the only inconvenience it poses to me is baseball. We are suppose to end the season toward the end of June but we will be lucky to finish by the time school starts after we makeup all of the games that got rained out!!!! LOL We are supposed to have a game tonight but we won't know for sure until this afternoon....hmmmm! All the "unseasonably cool" weather does not deter my kids from the pool, though!! The only day they haven't gone so far is one when it rained all day! Trust me, they would have gone if they could have. My oldest lovely asked the other day if she could go to the pool and I said I didn't think it was nice enough. She told me, "Mom, they don't close the pool for wind just thunder!" It's a good thing they don't or our pool would never be open! You can certainly pick out the pint size swimmers in the community......you know the ones - they have chlorine green or bleached out hair and, what I call, swimmers' face -- the shiny red eyes and the burnt skin from the chlorine. My kids hate the fact that I make them wear sunscreen all the time but I am trying to save them from repeating mistakes I made as a kid and I am still big enough to tell them what to do!! LOL Well, my lovelies will be up soon and I need to go find them something to do so that there will be at 10 minutes without fighting today -- that is another bad side effect of rain...."the trapped children in the house that like to pick on each other for fun until mom can't take it anymore and then we get into trouble" syndrome!! Oh sweet sunshine, where have you gone and will you ever come back? I want to use my swamp cooler!!!! Until next time....

Ever wonder what stress looks like??

2008-06-02T08:42:00.009-06:00

In case any of you haven't experienced extreme stress in a while, you should try building a wedding cake! Even when I have a good feeling in the beginning that all will go well, I am usually frazzled by the end of the day. (as is my husband -- he puts in just as much work as I do!) My last endeavor (this past weekend) was none the different. I had my cakes baked ahead of time and had all the things that I needed to get it done. I thought I was going right on time and then I had a fight with the frosting. I had one cake once where I had gotten so upset that I ended up throwing it and the frosting across the room. (it was one my first attempts before I knew a few trade secrets) Luckily, this time wasn't quite that drastic!! The funny thing is that every time I agree to do a wedding cake I swear that it will be my last......until next time. The other funny thing is that I am always thinking how great it would be to own a cake shop -- you would think that 4 kids and husband would be stressful enough, but I guess a girl can dream!! Also every time I do one I think that I haven't really done that many but then I always pull out the pictures and reminisce and realize that I have done my fair share. I know that the artist is always the most critical of their work (THAT WOULD BE ME) but I guess I must not do to bad of a job or people would stop asking me, right?! LOL! I guess it is a good sign that they still ask -- when they stop asking I will know that it is time to hang up the apron!

I have to say, I feel a little guilty about my son's third birthday -- it was actually on the day of the wedding so we celebrated his birthday a day later. I feel guilty because I have always made all of my kids' birthday cakes and I was not super-mom enough to do it this year. I just so happened to kill two birds with one stone by asking Miss Dairy Queen to fill in for me......."cake" and ice cream all in one -- ingenious!!!! Luckily for me he is only 3 and a boy so I think I may have been more effected by it than he. LOL!! Anyways, hope you enjoy the pictures (the one on the left is the one I did this weekend -- the one on the right is just one that I thought turned out pretty good!) Until next time....

Where did she go?

2008-05-28T11:15:00.004-06:00

In case you (all 2 or 3 of you) were wondering where I have been....I will tell you! On the 20th of May my sister had a new baby! He is such a dolly! As his favorite aunt I have been doing my share of spoiling him and helping out his mom. We have also been trying to get the deck done, the kids have their last day of school this Friday, I had 3 graduation cakes to make last weekend, we have had baseball (when they weren't cancelled by rain) and I have a wedding cake to make for Saturday! So I bet you are asking yourself -- that's it?? That's all she's been doing?? Oh wait -- that is what my husband would say.....sorry I got confused for a second! Actually, my husband is a great help when I need it and he even worked on the deck last weekend IN THE RAIN and I didn't even have to send him down guilt trip lane. After the big wedding cake on Saturday I have my son's 3rd birthday on Sunday. (his birthday is really on Saturday but I don't get paid to make his birthday cake -- LOL) We have had a couple of baseball games cancelled due to rain so I am sure we will be playing until August to make them all up!! LOL Anyways, I have rambled long enough....I guess I will get back to baking more cake! If it turns out ok maybe I will post a picture of it when I am finished!! Until next time....

Happy Mother's Day!

2008-05-12T08:38:00.003-06:00

I know this is a day late but I was busy being a mom/wife/carpenter etc....on the actual day! Yes I said carpenter. The husband and I had decided to build a deck sometime last year (or maybe it was 2 years ago -- I've lost track!) and I figured now was as good a time as any to start. Once we got going on it things went pretty fast. We are hoping to finish it this weekend. I can definately say that I am glad that I am the mom and he is the builder.....with my kid-induced brain shrinkage I am not sure that my math skills are capable of holding down such a job. Although, in my kids defense, I don't think I had the math skills before.....if I did then my math teachers from school must have mixed my grades up with someone else. I would like to safely tell my teachers that I have chosen a profession that does not not require the geometry that I almost flunked. Unless you you count the figuring I have to do when I rearrange my furniture!!!
Anyway, I would like to wish all of the mother's out there a very special Mother's Day!!!!
Until next time....

Here comes summer....that means baseball!!

2008-05-06T09:52:00.003-06:00

Our oldest little darling has been playing baseball/softball for about the last 4 years. When I say playing I mean chasing butterflies on the field or finding really pretty rocks for her collection. She was also more worried about what the "snack kid" brought for snacks than whether she got a hit or not. In the rookie league each kid gets about 100 attempts to hit the ball before their turn is over and then they usually forget where first base is. The whole point is to try and teach the kids good sportsmanship so they don't even keep score. (At least the adults don't...there is always at least one kid per side that keeps score!) My little lovely has finally moved up to the minor league. Her first game is tonight and she is TERRIFIED! She is scared because this is her first year with "fast-pitch" and she is afraid of getting hurt. (I have seen some of these girls pitch and I would be a little afraid myself!) She told me that she hopes she gets to play somewhere in the outfield where she doesn't have to do much....I told her that I don't think there is a position of play on the OTHER side of the fence. I am sure that if there was a position for "hot dog getter from the concession stand" she would be first in line. I'm not too sure but I think that the other 3 fourth graders on her team might feel the same way. I tried to tell her that after she gets through her first game she will get the feel for it and do better. She is already asking if she HAS to do this next year! We will see how she feels next year but she WILL finish this year....I already paid for everything! I will try to keep you updated on her season -- she has tournaments to finish out the season in July so I am sure there will be a few blurbs about it here and there. Lets hope that she stays safe, can maybe learn something and (you never know) she may even find a new special butterfly or rock!! Until next time....

Am I In The Right Place?

2008-04-30T09:25:00.003-06:00

For anyone who reads this blog (you must be pretty bored:-) you may have noticed that the looks of it has changed. I just wanted to let all my faithful readers (all 2 of them.....I am hoping for at least 3) know that I will probably do that from time to time. I guess I am a "change things around" kind of girl! If you were to come to my house once a month you would find that more often than not my furniture (in one room or another) is never in the same place. One of these days I am going to stumble out to the living room in the middle of the night (darned sleep walking disorder!!!!) and forget where my chair is and end up on the floor! Although, If you have been to my house lately you might think that the floor is not a bad alternative to the furniture as my darling youngest is starting to venture out in the food world. He now likes mobile snacks and he LOVES to smear said snacks. Maybe that is why, on the rare occasion, when company does come over they opt to sit in the kitchen....because who eats at the table anyway, right?! (Actually, I am proud to say that we do eat dinner at the table as a family it is just hard to teach a one year old to stay in the kitchen:-) Hopefully he will be more cooperative when it comes time to the potty training. I didn't think my soon-to-be 3 year old would ever learn and I had set myself up for a big fight but to my surprise he figured it out in less than a week. We did have an accident or two in the beginning but all is well now. I guess there is still that one little quirk......if I am within a 10 mile radius of him when nature calls, he would rather go in his pants than let anyone but me take him! I really hope that for the sake of his future wife this is a quirk that he will outgrow! (Although, I have met a few grown men in my day that always thought that they needed "help" because the doctor told them not to lift anything heavy.....I doubt I am the only girl that has encountered such men!...LOL) Anyways, baby is taking a nap so I think I will get the fabric cleaner out and put a shine on the furniture....he will need a clean palette for his creative outlet when he wakes up! Until next time....

Ahhh....Mondays!

2008-04-28T10:29:00.004-06:00

To all you parents out there....Are you familiar with the "I HATE MONDAYS" child? My oldest child (yes she happens to be a girl....and quite dramatic, I might add!) is famous in our house for feeling "sick" when it comes to Mondays. No matter how great she felt over the weekend or how great the weather might be on any given Monday, when I try to get her out of bed the first words out of her mouth are, "I don't feel good!" She is an honor roll student so I didn't feel like she was missing out on too much the first few times she missed but after a while I started to feel like I was in that story The Little Boy Who Cried Wolf. (or in this case the little girl) (To be honest with you, I am surprised that she hasn't tried my old bit yet -- "do I have a fever? Why yes you do and your temperature is hotter than the sun! ....No one told me that a fever of 150 might indicate a big problem!..LOL) As a parent you feel for any child that says they don't feel good and you want to make them feel better but there IS a line to be drawn somewhere. I may have to contact the Center For Disease Control and tell them that I have discovered a new illness called "Mondayitis". (I know it's not THAT new....I think we have all suffered from it a time or two!) The symptoms are: grogginess, irritability, pretending that they can't hear you, thinking that if they don't move you will forget about them, fighting with siblings, crying, pleading AND (if they finally get their way) sheer happiness. If they don't get their way.....LOOK OUT! My little darling will start stomping around and crying and mowing down anything in her way. She then starts her tirade of how dumb school is and that she wishes a tornado would hit it or it would flood or "they" would just stop having school! Amazingly enough, though, by the end of summer they have forgotten all about how much they hate school and are actually excited to go back. Lucky for all of us that live in THIS house, school is almost over! I guess when she is older and has to get a job she will realize just how "not bad" school was.....I'm just hoping she will be able to outgrow this "disease" before the start of school next fall! Until next time....

What is a "Headyball"?

2008-04-26T13:28:00.003-06:00

Many people have asked me what does Headyball mean? Well, to be quite honest with you, I'm not really sure myself! Apparently it was a nickname given to me by a dear friend of the family when I was just a little tyke. I have always been curious what a Headyball is but I feel safe in betting that whatever it is there is only one. I admit that I have been dubbed with numerous nicknames over the years, (some that might not be appropriate to mention here :-) but for some strange reason this was the one that stuck. I guess it isn't all bad.....Fat Fred or Heather Bofeather could have been the keepers! (There is always something worse, right?...lol)
Just ask my daughter what she thinks of nicknames.......Joe Dirt and Creep are two of her least favorites! In all fairness though, there is a story behind Joe Dirt. One day, as I was watching over my children with my eagle eye, my precious little girl decided that her bangs were too long and she proceeded to cut them to the length that resembled a scraggly rooster tail jutting off of her forehead. (Good thing was that she used her school safety scissors -- wouldn't want her to poke an eye out!) Did I mention that it was summer and my little darling had managed to avoid the bathtub for a few days? Thanks to the combination of the rooster tail bangs and hair that looked like she had been rolling around in a pine tree, my little angel now had a beautifully crafted mullet! Ah, the mullet.......a hairdo for any occasion, really. Anyways, when her dad got home and saw the mullet plus the dirty face plus the high water bibs she was wearing he couldn't help but dub her Joe Dirt!! (For those of you that have seen the movie Joe Dirt --and honestly, who hasn't-- she greatly resembled the young version of Joe when he got left at the Grand Canyon!) So there you have it.....there is always something worse, just ask Joe! Until next time....

Since I Have Nothing ELSE To Do.....

2008-04-25T13:31:00.003-06:00

As you read this you will probably figure out that I am new to the blogging scene. (writing them not reading them) My sister in law started one a while back and, I must say, I practically pee my pants everytime I read her posts. (because they are funny not because I have any kind of medical condition) Since I am a stay at home mom of 4 WONDERFULLY ANGELIC (I barely got that typed out before I had to stop and wipe the tears from my eyes because I was laughing so hard!) children, I thought I would start a blog that would allow me to share all of my trials and tribulations as said mom. I chose to title my first attempt "Since I have nothing ELSE to do.....because I get such a kick out of the people who don't spend much time around children....You know the ones -- They ask, "So what do you do for a living?" I reply, "I am a stay at home mom." Then, without truly understanding what they are saying they reply, "A STAY AT HOME MOM?! YOU ARE SOOOO... LUCKY!" "Really?" I ask. "Have you met my kids?" Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my children but sometimes I wonder what I did to deserve this....Oh wait, I remember now -- somewhere back in my childhood I vaguely remember hearing my mom threaten me with those famous words...."I hope that when you have kids they act exactly like you did!" Well guess what mom? You got your wish only I think God sprinkled a little extra hot sauce on mine!!!! It is pretty funny how when you are young you think that your parents know nothing but as soon as you have kids you realize just what true geniuses they really are! If only we had listened sooner!
My goal for this blog is to be able to share funny stories and anything else that comes to mind....let's just hope that it doesn't get in the way of my bon bon eating, magazine reading and soap watching time -- after all, isn't that what all stay at home mom's do? I gotta go -- Dr. Phil is on! Until next time......